


More To Us: Volume I

by b074



Series: More To Us [2]
Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Carmilla - Freeform, Carmilla Movie, F/F, F/M, Hollstein - Freeform, Natlise, Negovanman - Freeform, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-21
Updated: 2018-12-27
Packaged: 2019-02-05 05:25:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 29
Words: 37,762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12787962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/b074/pseuds/b074
Summary: This is the first official book following Prologue: Blank Minds and Blinking Lights which can be found on my profile. It picks up right at the end of the Prologue so you may need to read that before starting this.This is a Negovanman story where you'll see the relationship between Natasha and Elise take a new turn as they've been best friends for past 2 years. They have to balance out the tragedy they have just faced with Natasha's 4-year-old son Andrew and their current life. Elise isn't happy with Andrew's absent father showing up and just walking into the life of both Natasha and Andrew.





	1. Chapter 1

Hello Everyone! Some of you may be new readers and other returning from my small break from recently uploading my first story called Prologue: Blank Minds and Blinking lights but all are welcome. I am B your author. I work on my own but if any reader has any ideas they are always welcome. I always try to check my comments often so just leave a comment and I will try to address it as fast as possible. 

For those who missed the description of this book, it is recommended that you read the Prologue first which can also be found on my profile.

Thank you for reading everyone!

\- B


	2. Chapter 1: Pain Is Underrated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This picks up right after where we left off at in the Prologue

****POV Natasha** **

_Shortly after a doctor came out. His face said it all._

He didn't need to say anything. The moment he walked out I saw the apologetic look in his eyes. But I still stood there hoping for the best.

"Are you Ms. Negovanlis?" The doctor approaches me first.

"Yes." I barely croak out an answer.

"Your son, he's in critical conditions and..."

Andrew's not dead. I can sense all the terrible things to come but he's not dead.

"... he's been under surgery for several hours and his small body couldn't take it."

My heart drops.

"We were able to stabilize him but he's fallen into a coma and is currently on life support."

There it was. Now I'm thinking death may be better than life support.

"So... um..." I'm stuttering and can't get any words out.

"So what does this mean for Andrew in the future?" I look up to see Jacob, Andrew's dad speak up on my behalf.

"Are you Andrew's father?" The doctor gives him a confused look.

"Yes. I don't live with Andrew and his mother but I did come as fast as I could."

"I see. Well, there are a few possibilities. People with injuries as extensive as Andrew's could stay in a coma for several weeks maybe even months. So in my professional opinion, I think we should watch over him for a few weeks in hopes that he does wake up. However, if he does wake up there could be defects in his brain from not functioning for a long time. You also have to take into consideration the possibility that he might not wake up and having to decide whether or not you will keep him on life support."

After what I feel like has been ages I look over to Elise. She's been quietly standing there holding my hand the whole time. She has a conflicting expression on her face as she probably has several different things going through her mind. First off, this accident itself has brought up tragic memories and she's trying to keep herself from going insane. Then there's the fact that she doesn't like Jacob very much. She's met him once before when he swung by to drop off some of Andrew's stuff. She didn't know him before we met but she finds his absence in Andrew's life unsettling. So the fact that Andrew is in critical condition and his MIA father is standing in the lobby is conflicting for her.

"Thank you, doctor..."

"Jones, Dr. Jones"

"Thank you." That's all I'm able to stammer out.

Dr. Jones shows us the way towards where Andrew has been transferred to and I don't realize I've been holding my breath until I let out a much-needed sigh at the sight of my son. First, Elise hurries over to Andrew's left-hand side. I follow suit to his right. Elise and I are preoccupied just looking over the visible injuries of Andrew, which aren't as bad, expected. But no matter how healthy he looked on the outside I knew my baby was dying on the inside. I finally look up to see Jacob awkwardly standing at the foot of the bed. 2 years since he's seen his son and 2 years he's never getting back and now he's standing here probably as concerned as I am. Absent or not I can allow Jacob to feel the pain of a parent.

"Um Natasha, I can stay here with him overnight so that you can get some rest." After some looming minutes, Jacob spoke up.

"No no no I've been gone for too long I need to be with him right now."

Jacob doesn't argue and leaves to grab the three of us coffee. After he leaves Elise finally says something.

"Why is he here? I mean yes, he's Andrew's father but what right does he think he has to just show up and stick around?" I can hear the aggravation in Elise's voice.

I let out a long sigh, "No one said anything about him staying. But he does have the right to know how his son is doing. Let's just get through these few days and we can deal with Jacob later."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I hope y'all enjoyed the first chapter of More To Us. I know this one was a bit short and sadly the next few chapters will be about the same length. When I'm on a more regular schedule I will try to make each chapter a bit meatier but for now, you have this! There is a separate book under my profile for it so you should go add it to your bookshelf so you don't miss any more updates ;).
> 
> \- B


	3. Chapter 2: Regret

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Ok not a lot happens in this chapter but it was a necessary chapter in order to lay the foundation of this book.
> 
> \- B

**POV Jacob**

What am I doing right now? My son is laying in a bed in a coma and I'm helplessly just going to get coffee? I still remember coming home 2 years ago to an envelope, which contained our divorce papers. I saw it coming. Natasha and I met back in college and we instantly fell in love and even before we were out of school we got married. After we graduated we started facing some struggles. We always dreamed big, it was one of the many things that drew me to Natasha. We wanted lots of kids and planned on building good careers for ourselves so we could support our family and be happy. But sometimes dreams are only dreams. The first year into our marriage Natasha was out getting acting gigs and I struggled to find work. When Natasha got pregnant with Andrew I knew I had to start trying harder because Natasha wasn't going to be able to go out as much. I had picked up a few night shifts as a cashier and a delivery guy but we were still tight on budget. Once Andrew was born Natasha and I started getting into arguments every other day. I don't blame her though. She was always up with Andrew and was exhausted and I couldn't do more to provide for them. Sometimes I wish that financial issues were the only dent in our relationship. But with all the arguments Natasha and I grew apart. The love that existed during our college years seemed to be gone now. After Andrew turned one we decided that we needed some space from each other so I temporarily moved out. I had Andrew three days a week and this lasted for a few months. When I finally started to get my life together I moved back into the house. I thought that now with a job that could support us financially Natasha and I would be able to go back to what we used to have but I was wrong. For the first few weeks, I was just sleeping on the couch and even when I did move back into our bedroom Natasha and I barely interacted. So I started spending more time with my work buddies than I did at home with my kid. Looking back now there are so many things I wish I could change but it's too late now. One night my co-workers and I went out for a few drinks and I decided to let loose a bit. With the hostility under my own roof, I didn't think it would hurt to have some fun for a change. That night I ended up getting drunk and hooking up with some chick that I don't even remember. All I remember now is that I woke the next morning realizing that I had lost what little I had left of my relationship with Natasha. We might have been distant for awhile but I still loved her so I went home that day and told her what had happened. The worst part about it was that Natasha didn't seem phased by it. But I knew Natasha wasn't going to let this go. Weeks went by without talking about what I did. I stayed in on the weekends and hung out with Andrew and I tried to be more present in his life. That's when the divorce papers showed up. I can't say I was surprised but my heart still broke. Natasha and I had something beautiful back in college and that spark went away and I messed up. I opened the envelope containing the papers to see that Natasha had already signed everything so all I needed to do was sign and it would be over. After our divorce was finalized and I officially moved out I found it hard to stay connected with Andrew. I had gotten a promotion that moved me 3 hours away from where Natasha and Andrew lived so I rarely got to see him. I didn't know how to insert myself into Andrew's life without stepping on Natasha's toes so I stayed out of it all together. I had hurt both of them enough so I thought they would be better off without me. Now I'm here walking through a hospital with a son in a coma regretting all the decisions in my life. I need to do something right for once but I don't know what.


	4. Chapter 3: It's Complicated

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey Everyone! I hope y'all are having a fantastic Thanksgiving and for those of you who don't celebrate, I hope today was just another fantastic day. Thank you all again for making this book possible and sticking around to read every chapter. I appreciate each and every one of you. Enjoy the new update!
> 
> \- B

****POV Elise** **

I’m torn. For many reasons. First, I feel like I should be glad that Andrew didn’t face the same fate as my mother but somehow having to watch Natasha in pain because no one could help her son seemed more painful. Second, Jacob is back in town. I don’t know a lot about him because Natasha didn’t say much other than that they were high school sweethearts that fell out of love. I didn’t pry because I always respected Natasha’s space but something about his reappearance was rubbing me the wrong way. It’s obvious something used to exist between the two seeing how easily she fell into his arms. I can’t quite put a finger on it but seeing him around Natasha bothered me.

“Hey, I’m back with the coffees… I wasn’t sure how you took yours so I just got black with some sugar and cream on the side.” Jacob walked in handing me the coffee.

“Thank you.”

“Um, any updates on Andrew’s condition?”

“You’ve been gone for only 20 minutes. So no.”

I didn’t mean to be so passive but Jacob just accepted it and sat down on the chair by the door.

“Hey, I’m going to the restroom real quick. If a nurse comes by just tell her to wait for me would, yah?” Natasha stood up and walked to the door.

“Yah of course.” Jacob and I replied in unison.

Now it was just Jacob and me.

“Thank you.” Jacob broke the silence first.

“Thank you for taking care of Andrew and being there for Natasha the past couple of years.”

“Yeah well, you walked out of their lives and left them to fend for their own. If you would have stuck around then maybe Andrew would have a dad around.” Now I was starting to get mad and I didn’t know why. I didn’t even know this guy.

“You have every right to be mad at me. I did leave Andrew fatherless but I wasn’t the one who decided to just walk out. Natasha is the one who filed for divorce.”

“Oh.” Now I felt like a jackass for getting all fired up.

“I don’t blame Natasha for any of it though. I played my part in breaking our marriage. But I left town because that’s what Natasha thought was best for the both of them. I wish I stuck around and actually played a father figure in Andrew’s life but some things you can’t change. When Andrew wakes up I’m planning on moving back and spending more time with Andrew. That is if Natasha lets me.” My heart dropped on the last part.

“You’re planning on moving back?”

“Yeah. I know I don’t have to right to just insert my life into Andrew’s life now after being gone for so long but I do want Andrew to grow up knowing he has a dad he can rely on. I got promoted at work so they agreed to transfer me to an office in town if I do decide to move.”

I know it would better for Andrew if his father was around but I didn’t want Jacob to move back. I loved the dynamic the three of us already had and I didn’t want Jacob just walking in and changing that. Also what if Jacob’s moving back rekindles their love. What if he hurts Natasha again. I mean it’s not like Natasha and I are dating or anything and I should get jealous but something about that thought was unsettling.

“Did I miss anything?” Natasha walks back in with an anxious look on her face.

“No, you didn’t. Don’t worry.” Seeing Natasha this anxious and worried pained me.

“Do you want me to pick anything up from the house for you? I can also get you guys some dinner before I head out.” Jacob was now standing facing Natasha.

“Yeah, I think that would be nice. Do you mind getting me a spare set of clothes for both Andrew and I and a blanket? Would you mind taking my luggage back home too?”

“No of course not. Did you need anything Elise?”

“No, I’m fine.” There I go with my passive responses again.

“Ok well if you still keep the spare key under the welcome mat I can use that to get in and I can pick up some Chinese food if that’s still your favorite.”

Natasha chuckled in response. This was the first time she actually smiled since she got here.

“Hmm, 2 years and I guess some things just don’t change. Do you need a place to stay while you’re in town?” With a slight smile and sad eyes, Natasha was looking up at Jacob.

“Oh no it’s ok I booked a hotel for the next couple of nights.”

“Well if you’d like you can stay at our place afterward. There’s a guest bedroom that should be already set up.”

“Thanks, Nat.” Jacob then walked out.

No one ever called Natasha Nat. She told me that she hated being called that but here was Jacob, her ex-husband calling her Nat. Maybe this was jealousy but whatever it was I didn’t like the feeling.

“Why are you so nice to him?”

Natasha was looking at Andrew and sighed. “We may not be in love anymore but we had something good, Elise.”

“I know that but he was gone for 2 years. No phone calls no nothing and you’re so calm about him coming back!” I didn’t mean to raise my voice but I was getting frustrated.

“It’s complicated Elise. I mean I was the one who called him first. Can we talk about this tomorrow? You and I have had a long day and I don’t think talking about my past marriage will make it any better.” I could see the exhaustion wash over Natasha’s face.

“You’re right. I’m sorry I shouldn’t be prying. I’m just frustrated because when I met you 2 years ago you were broken and all alone and I’d hate to see that happen again.” Now I felt a pang of guilt from my sudden outburst.

“I know you’re just looking out for me Elise and I will forever be indebted to you for that but my relationship with Jacob is a bit more complicated than that.”

“Okay.” I decided to let this go for now but I still didn’t feel good about Jacob.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: For all those readers who are anxious for the Negovanman relationship to pick up its pace I am sorry! I know it's a slow burn but I promise it's coming. But with how I've set up the story in the prologue I need to shape the beginning of this one a bit before we can dive into the good stuff. So bear with me for the next few chapters and I promise something good will come out of it.
> 
> \- B


	5. Chapter 4: For Old Times Sake

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I know I'm cutting it close with today's update but to make up for it it's a bit longer! Enjoy!
> 
> \- B

****One week later (still at the hospital)** **

****POV Natasha** **

It’s been a week since the accident occurred and I don’t think I’ve ever been this tired in my life. Even though both Elise and Jacob have insisted on staying at the hospital I just couldn’t bear to leave Andrew’s side. The doctor said it would take several weeks even months if he did wake up and I’m just hopelessly sitting here waiting for a miracle.

And there’s Jacob.

I haven’t seen him in over 2 years and if I’m being honest at times I have missed him. What happened between us, what we both lost was on us both and sometimes I blame myself for Andrew losing a father figure in his life but out of all of this, I got Elise. I don’t think I could thank her enough for everything she has done for both Andrew and me. She hasn’t been taking this accident very well herself as it just brings up terrible memories for her. She also doesn’t seem to like the presence of Jacob. I find it kind of cute, her need to be overprotective of me. I haven’t told her the full story of Jacob and me’s relationship and I worry if I do now she’ll kick Jacob out the door right away and see me as a different person. Jacob and I may not be in love anymore but I will always love him. That night when he came home and told me he cheated I felt a wave of relief wash over me. While he and I were separated I met a guy. It didn’t last very long because I knew it was wrong I still had Andrew but I still made my mistakes. To this day Jacob doesn’t know. I know I should have told him when he told me but I didn’t see the reason why. In that moment I realized that our marriage was broken so why add salt to the wound. I filed for divorce and haven’t seen him since. The only thing I regretted about our divorce was that Jacob has been beating himself up for the past 2 years. It’s cruel of me to let him but confronting him meant confronting myself and where I was at life didn’t allow me the opportunity to stop and breathe and analyze. So here I am seeing the past love of my life, drowning in my past memories.

“Hey, are you ok?” Elise snaps me out of my thoughts.

“Yeah, yeah, just thinking. How are you holding up?”

“Well surprisingly I’m better then I thought I would be. I’ve talked to my boss and pushed back some deadlines so I could spend more time here considering you won’t go home.” I could hear the lightheartedness in Elise’s last comment.

“I just can’t miss anything. I’m going to have to leave soon for my film and I just want to spend as much time as I can with Andrew before then. Even if he’s not awake for it…”

“I get it. But you should still go home and sleep in an actual bed for once. Will you please just take the next 2 days off from hospital room chaperoning and go home? I’ll promise to call you the moment something changes.” Elise looks at me with concern.

“Okay.”

I would insist on staying but honestly, I’m just so exhausted I can’t.

I pack up my things and head out. At the lobby of the hospital, I run into Jacob.

“Finally heading home?” Jacob cracks that half smile that I used to never be able to resist.

“Yeah, Elise insisted that I go home for a couple nights. Are you going up to see Andrew?”

“Actually I was going up to see you… um, do you want a ride home? I drove my car here.” Jacob looks a bit anxious.

“Oh. Yeah, I guess a ride wouldn’t hurt.”

I oblige and we head to the parking lot.

Jacob walks over to the passenger side and opens the door. I get in the car and all these memories from our past start flooding in.

 

_November 18th, 2011_

_“My lady” Jacob mockingly bows his head as he opens the door for me._

_I giggle as I get in the car and buckle up. It’s the middle of November and Jacob and I were driving home to his place to celebrate Thanksgiving at his family’s house. On the way, Jacob pulled over to a park that was newly covered in snow and it was beautiful._

_“I thought we were going home?” I asked curiously._

_“We are. But I just needed to make one quick stop before we left.”_

_Confused I followed Jacob out of the car and into the park. We walked around a bit holding hands when Jacob stopped and turned around to look at me._

_“I know this isn’t the most romantic gesture but I’ve been trying to find the perfect time to do this but then I thought ‘fuck perfect timing’ if you love someone you just do it.”_

_I knew what was coming and I was starting to tear up._

_“Natasha, the past year of my life has been the best year and that’s all because I met you. Your passion and drive as a human being have motivated me to be a better man. If you would allow me, I would love to spend the rest of my lives with you in my arms. I love you so much. Natasha Negovanlis would you do me the honors of becoming my wife?” Jacob dropped down to one knee and pulled out a gorgeous ring._

_“Yes! I would be honored to marry you, Jacob Edwardson. I would say yes a million times over if I could.”_

 

_June 7th, 2012_

_“Please watch your step Mrs. Natasha Negovanlis-Edwardson.” Jacob held my hand as he guided me into the limo._

_The first day of being married and I don’t think I’ve ever been happier. Jacob and I had planned our whole future ahead of us and this was the first big step towards it._

_“Thank you, Mr. Edwardson.” With a courteous smile, I got into the limo_

 

_May 21st, 2013_

_“Watch your step.” Jacob was cautiously watching me as he opened the door to the passenger seat._

_It was 2 days after Andrew was born and Jacob and I were finally getting to go home with our baby boy._

_“Do we have everything? I think I got all the diapers and formula and everything at home.” I could hear Jacob starting to panic._

_“Jacob, it’s ok. Calm down. We have everything we need and you’ve already been to the house a million times to make sure we have everything, I know this is all new to the both of us but starting it off in panic won’t do either of us any good.”_

_“You’re right. I just want the best for our son. I want to be the best father that I can be. I just don’t want to screw up anything.” I could see the anxiety still lingering in Jacob’s eyes but he was starting to calm down._

_“Hey, don’t worry. You’ll do great. You and I make a great team and we’ll do everything in our abilities to make Andrew’s life the best it can be. But for now, I think we just need to make it home and take a nap first.”_

 

“So how have you been?” I look over to Jacob and ask.

“I’ve been well. I just got a new promotion at work so that’s been good. You?”

“That’s good to hear. I’ve been working on a new movie project in L.A. which I actually have to fly back out for in a couple of weeks.”

“That’s nice to hear that you’ve still been pursuing your acting career. You were always so driven.” Jacob kept his eye on the road but took a couple glances over at me.

“You know, with how things ended between us I still wanted what was best for you. I hoped that you would be able to get your life straightened out and be happy.” I look over with sympathetic eyes.

“Thanks, Nat.”

That name. No one else called me Nat. When Jacob called me that in the hospital I could see that Elise was bothered by it. But it’s been so long since I’ve been called Nat”

“Well, we’re here at your place. I’m going to head out to grab some food.”

“Thank you, Jacob. For coming down. And for the ride.” I open the door to get out.

“I’d do it in a heartbeat. Hey Nat?”

“Yeah?” I look back at Jacob with an eyebrow raised.

“Would you like to get some coffee tomorrow? For old times sake?”

“Yeah. I think I’d like that.” With a smile on my face, I walk to my house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Thank you all again for continuing to read my story as I find my way around this new world of writing. With that being said this will be the last of my everyday posting for now. I'm hoping to post at least once a week and maybe around the holidays, I can post a bit more often. But until January I've still got school and work so I don't have a lot of free time on my hands. Thank you for understanding and for those of you who live in cold areas stay warm!
> 
> \- B


	6. Chapter 5: Realization

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hi Everyone! New update here! For those of you waiting for Negovanman to finally happen, we are finally making our way towards that direction ;). I hope you enjoy this new update!
> 
> \- B

****The next day (at the hospital)** **

****POV Elise** **

****_From Vanlis:_ ** ** _Hey Elise, I’m going out to grab a coffee with Jacob. I’ll be at the hospital in an hour or so. Do you want me to pick up anything for you?_

There it is again. That feeling in my chest with just the thought of her out with Jacob. It’s just coffee. I don’t need to think about it. Natasha’s life is her own business and I don’t need to be je--- worried about her.

****_To Vanlis:_ ** ** _No, it’s ok. I’m glad you’re doing something other than sitting around. Have fun._

I am glad she’s doing something else. Just not the fact that it’s with Jacob. And do I really want her to have fun with Jacob? Not really but I always want the best for her so I just have to suck up whatever feelings I think I have towards Jacob and deal with it.

****POV Natasha** **

My phone vibrates and I see that Elise responded.

****_From Baeman:_ ** ** _No, it’s ok. I’m glad you’re doing something other than sitting around. Have fun._

I smile at the response.

****_To Baeman:_ ** ** _Thanks. I’ll see you later._

I know that Elise has been struggling with Jacob being around lately and I don’t blame her. She and I have gotten really close in the past 2 years and with Jacob in the picture all of a sudden it must be really unsettling for her. I need to talk to her about everything later. I’ll make a mental note of that but for now, I’m getting coffee with Jacob.

“You ready to go out?” Jacob is coming down the stairs as I grab my jacket.

“Yeah, let's go” Jacob grabs his car keys and we head out.

The drive to the café is short and quiet.

Jacob pulls into the parking lot of Blue Bear Café. He and I used to come here often when we were together. A lot of nostalgic feelings right now.

“It’s been such a long time since I’ve been here. Not a single thing has changed.” Jacob looks over at me with his hands in his pockets.

“Yeah. I haven’t been here as often as we used to. I actually didn’t start coming back until a few months after our divorce.” I look down at my feet with my confession.

“I’m sorry Natasha. I’m sorry for everything that happened between us and for what I did. I’m sorry that Andrew didn’t have a father around and I couldn’t provide for you like a man.”

“No, I need you to stop apologizing. Yes, you did some things that you shouldn’t be proud of but so did I. I was with someone. When we were separated I met a guy and it only lasted a week but I had a thing.” I look over at Jacob with weary eyes.

“That’s why you didn’t seem hurt that day. When I told you.”

“Yeah.”

“Well, now that everything is out in the air we can move on. You and I have done things that are meant to be left in the past. We’re not here to dig up past regrets.”

“Okay.” I look up with a weak smile.

We finally get out of the car and walk into the café. Jacob orders for the both of us and we find a window seat and sit down.

“So you and Elise.”

“Yeah?” I’m surprised by the mention of her name.

“Are you guys together? I don’t know how much me she knows but she doesn’t seem to like me very much and seems very protective of you. Which I appreciate by the way.”

I let out a small laugh at the comment. “No, we’re not together. Just really good friends. After you moved out I met her in New York and she’s been staying with Andrew and me ever since.”

“So does that mean you’re single?” Jacob asks hesitantly.

“Yeah.” I respond with a half smile and take a sip from my cup.

“I’m so busy with work and traveling I haven’t gotten a chance to meet anyone. I also wanted to focus on myself for a bit. I mean you and I met and were together since college. I didn’t get a chance to be on own for a while.”

“You’re right. I’m glad you’re doing better. You really deserve it.”

“Are you seeing anyone?”

“Not currently. I met a girl last year and it was good for a bit but she got transferred to Japan and the long distance thing didn’t really work out for us.”

“It’s good to hear that you’re putting yourself out there again and moving on.” It was sad but nice to hear that Jacob was moving on with his life.

“I actually wanted to ask you something today.” He sounded nervous.

“Yeah?”

“I was wondering if it was okay with you if I moved back into town. I would get my own place and everything I can stay out of your way if you want but I really want to be back in Andrew’s life.” I’m taken back by his request.

“Oh wow. If I’m being honest I would love for you to be in Andrew’s life again but there’s so much to consider. I need to make sure Elise is comfortable with it and if Andrew does wake up I don’t want him going through an abrupt change during a sensitive time.”

“You’re right. I know this is sudden but I didn’t want to call you out of the blue and ask and when I heard what happened with Andrew I knew I had to ask once I came down.”

“I appreciate it. I’ll get back to you about it in a few days.”

“Thanks Nat for even considering it.”

We continued to catch up and when I saw that we’ve been talking for over an hour we headed back to the hospital. Jacob dropped me off at the hospital and went back home to grab some things.

****_From Jacob:_ ** ** _Thank you for getting coffee with me. It was nice. Can we do it again sometime? You know after everything settles down a bit._

****_To Jacob:_ ** ** _Of course. It was nice to catch up. Maybe when Andrew gets better we can plan something._

I walk into Andrew’s room to see that Elise is asleep in the chair next to Andrew’s bed. Careful not to wake her up I quietly close the door and put a blanket over her and walk over to the other side of the room.

After an hour or so Elise finally wakes up.

“You’re back.” Elise’s voice is hoarse from just waking up. My favorite.

“Yeah. I’ve actually been back for an hour but I thought I’d let you sleep.” I smile at Elise.

“Oh, thanks. How was coffee with Jacob?” There’s something about the tone of her voice. Probably because she just woke up.

“It was good. He asked if we were together.” I let out a small laugh thinking back to it.

“Haha did he now? I mean I’d say we pretty much are. We live together and raise a child together so.” There it is again in her voice.

“I guess we’re domestic best friends then.” I respond lightheartedly.

Elise frowns for a split second and I almost miss it.

“Yeah, I guess so.” Elise sits up and straightens her blanket.

As I’m about to ask Elise about Jacob a nurse comes in to do her rounds.

****POV Elise** **

What has gotten into me? At this point, I can’t even hide the fact that I’m not the slightest bit happy about the presence of Jacob. Natasha even brought up the fact that he asked if we were together. Does that mean he’s jealous of me? I don’t know what’s happening but I think I’m starting to realize that I have some sort of feelings for Natasha. Why else would I feel this aggressive towards Jacob and unsettled by the fact that they’re spending time together?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I hope y'all enjoyed this chapter! I actually have a favor to ask you guys. I still need a cover for this series and I was really hoping to use a fanart if possible or some sort edit so if you guys have any recommendations or even want to draw/create one for me please leave a comment. Thanks!
> 
> \- B


	7. Chapter 6: Is This Just Infatuation?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey guys! I'm sorry for the late update. I had a super busy weekend and actually a super busy week this week but I thought you guys still deserved an update. This chapter is a bit short and fast paced but I hope you still like it.
> 
> \- B

****POV Jacob** **

I think I still love Natasha.

Actually no, I know I still love her. I don’t know if it’s because I’ll always love her or I want her back but I know I want to be in her life again.

****POV Elise** **

I think I like Natasha.

Maybe it’s all this time I’ve been spending with her but my feelings are all over the place. I don’t even know if it’s appropriate for me to have these feelings for her during this critical time let alone tell her.

****POV Natasha** **

So much has happened in the last few weeks and I’m finally getting to sit down and take a breath. I’ve been getting mixed signals from both Jacob and Elise lately and I don’t know what to do about it. Jacob was my first love and the father of my son but we tried once and it didn’t work. On the other hand, there’s Elise who’s my best friend and my greatest support system the last two years but that’s all she’s been so what’s changed now?

Andrew is still in his coma and I don’t know what to do with my life. I’m in L.A. working on my film while Jacob and Elise try to stay civil as they look after Andrew on my behalf. I really hope they haven’t ripped each other apart yet.

****_Flashback to a week ago_ ** **

_“What do you mean Jacob is moving back?!” I could tell Elise wasn’t very happy_

_“I know I should’ve talked to you about it and I meant to but with all the hospital stuff happening I couldn’t find the right time to bring it up.” I felt terrible_

_“Who does he think he is just waltzing back into your life and settling in?” Elise’s voice was finally calming down a bit._

_“He actually said he wants you to be okay with it before he moves back.” I felt like I was just adding fuel to the fire now._

_“Then no, he’s not coming back. What good is it going to do you and Andrew anyways?” Elise had her arms crossed over her small body._

_She may be small but she can get quite scary when she’s mad._

_“I mean I’m going to California in a couple of days and I thought it would be beneficial for the both of us he stuck around.” I let out a big sigh. I didn’t want to fight with her._

_“The past two years we were fine. When you were gone Andrew and I had a great time and we were fine. Just because he’s hospitalized doesn’t mean I need his wreck of a father back in his life.” Now Elise was getting harsh._

_“Why do you hate him so much?” I shot back. I couldn’t stay any more patient._

_“What?” Elise was taken back by my sudden change of tone._

_“Why do you hate Jacob so much? Yeah, he wasn’t a part of Andrew’s life for two years but that wasn’t his fault. Why do you keep blaming the man for something that happened years ago? Just help me understand Elise?” I retreated back to being calm._

_“…Have you forgiven him?” Elise’s eyes were soft now._

_“I don’t know. So much has happened between us and I don’t have the right to judge him as much as you think I should.” I looked down as I spoke._

_“What are you not telling me, Natasha?” Elise was looking directly at me now._

_****Sigh****  “Nothing, nothing important.” I could tell she didn’t believe me but she let it go._

_“What are you not telling me?” Confusion washed over Elise’s face and for a second I saw a bit of worry flicker in her eyes._

_“Nothing. Jacob can stay. I just don’t want to deal with him.” I just nodded in return._

****A week later** **

****POV Jacob** **

I need to tell Natasha. I should.

No, it’s not fair of me to do this to her. Elise already wants me dead. No need to make her hate me more. I mean I can’t blame her for hating me so much. I’m guessing Natasha hasn’t told her anything yet or she has and she still hates me.

****POV Elise** **

I want to tell her. What if Jacob makes a move first and I miss my shot? Do I even have a shot to start off with? I mean her son is in a coma and her first love is living with us now. Yeah, I’ve got no shot. But we have something special.

****A day later** **

****POV Jacob** **

I grab my coat and keys and head downstairs. I’m supposed to switch shifts with Elise now. I see my phone sitting on the counter and think back to this week.

I pick it up and dial the familiar number.

****POV Elise** **

I look down at my watch. Jacob is supposed to be here in 30 minutes. The thought of Jacob makes me think of Natasha. Without thinking I reach for my phone and I call her.

****POV Natasha** **

I’ve been keeping busy with work the past couple of weeks and it’s been helping. I’ve been able to get my mind off of things and ignore everything that’s been going on at home. I’m walking over to my trailer and my phone vibrates in my hand. I look at the caller ID and pick up.

“Hey…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter even though it was pretty short! So a bit of a layout for the rest of the year. I am going on winter break in 3 days so hopefully, I'll be able to update again by the end of the week! I'm going to be gone without wifi for a week during break and then have school right after that so I don't know how updates will be like during then but I'll try to upload one more chapter before we hit 2018. Thanks for sticking around!
> 
> \- B


	8. Chapter 7: Your Move

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I just wanted to say thanks to all you readers and supporters and one way I wanted to say thanks was by having a livestream on my insta at 7pm CT. My handle is @captain_of_the_otps so jump right on over and you’ll get a sneak peek of the next chapter as I write and even get a chance to pitch some ideas :).
> 
> \- B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Surprise! Hi everyone! So this is a short chapter but it covers a lot. I had some time on my hands and the last chapter wasn't really my favorite so I thought I owed it to you guys so here is this one. I can't promise another update this weekend but it's possible so enjoy :).
> 
> \- B

**POV Natasha**

“Hey…"

“Hi” I can hear Elise take a big breath.

“I need to tell you something… I’m into you and I know this is really not the best time to be telling you but I think I’m starting to really like you beyond what we have and that’s all that’s been on my mind lately and I don’t like the idea of Jacob around because I think he still loves you and I just want you to be happy and I want you to do what makes you happy but I needed to get that out that there an---“ I’m taken back by Elise’s rambling but I find it adorable.

“Elise, breath,” I say in a soothing voice.

“Right.” I can hear Elise take another breath and stop.

I can’t say I didn’t completely see this coming but I didn’t think it was something I would have to think about now. With everything that’s happened and Jacob back home I don’t think I have the mental capacity to deal with this.

After a moment I finally respond. “I appreciate you telling me.”

“You do?” Now it’s Elise who’s taken back.

“Yes, I do. But since you were honest I think I should be too.”

“Okay…” Elise is hesitant but I can still hear her breathing on the other end so I know she’s listening.

“If I’m being honest us together is something I didn’t imagine. With that being said I’m not saying it’s not possible. I think I like you too and for now, we may just sound like some teenagers passing glances across a room but I think that’s how it needs to stay for now. And since you brought up Jacob I should tell you that he called right before you. You’re right he still loves me…”

Elise must’ve been holding in a breath because I hear he exhale on the other end.

“…but that doesn’t mean I’m going to jump right back into it. I just don’t think I have the capacity to emotionally invest myself in someone right now. It wouldn’t fair to either of you.”

“He called you first?” I could hear the hurt in Elise’s voice.

“Yeah.”

“Okay. Um, I gotta go. I’ll talk to you later.” Elise sounded rushed now.

“Oh okay, b--” Elise hung up before I could even say bye.

What is happening to me right now? First, my ex-husband comes back and tells me he still loves me and then my best friend tells me that she likes me. I can’t do this. There’s too much to think about and I love them both and I can’t hurt one over the other. When I let down Jacob he seemed okay but Elise seemed really hurt. I don’t know what more I could’ve said to her to make her feel any better. It wouldn’t be fair to her if I just said yes and started dating her. It would be worse than trying when things are better. I just want to press pause in life right now.

**POV Elise**

He called her first. He beat me to it. I know I shouldn’t be mad at Natasha, she didn’t do anything but I can help but feel frustrated. He hurt her yet she’s here even considering the idea of getting back together with him? I mean granted she didn’t say that outright but that’s a possibility.

If I really want what’s best for her I should understand where’s she’s coming from. I mean I just told her that I might be falling for her while her son is in a coma and she’s in a different country. Maybe this is my fault. I should’ve just waited and now I just made things awkward.

Did I just throw any chance I had out the window? Is she going to go running into Jacob’s arms now? I mean he is the father of Andrew after all. What was I thinking?

In the midst of my mental ramble, I look up to see Andrew looking at me.

“Andrew? Can you hear me, Andrew?” I rush over to Andrew’s side.

He tries to say something but is struggling.

“No no don’t try to talk. Just nod your head yes or no.” Andrew nods back.

I call a nurse who calls Natasha and Jacob.


	9. Livestream!

40 minutes till the livestream everyone! Catch me at @captain_of_the_otps on Instagram at 7pm CT and you'll get to ask question, pitch some ideas, and even get a sneak peek of Chapter 8. So join me!

\- B


	10. Chapter 8: Wearing My Heart On My Sleeve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey everyone! I've got a new update for you guys and it's extra long. You're welcome :). I know my updates haven't been really consistent and I've got no schedule going but at least I'm posting at least once a week. Right now it's winter break so I've been writing a bit more but I can't promise you it'll always be like this. Anyways, enjoy the chapter!
> 
> \- B

****POV Andrew** **

My head hurts. Mommy? Auntie Elise? Auntie Elise, can you hear me?

“Andrew? Can you hear me, Andrew?” It’s Auntie Elise

Yes, I can hear you, Auntie Elise. But can you hear me?

“No no don’t try to talk. Just nod your head yes or no.”

Oh no, I can’t talk. I want mommy.

I think I should nod my head though.

Everything is so white.

There’s a strange man over there. I don’t know him.

Who’s that that Auntie Elise?

****POV Elise** **

Andrew is just looking at me with a blank expression. I can’t tell if he’s in pain or not or if he needs anything. Andrew’s gaze shifts over to the door so I look up to see Jacob standing there.

“I was on my way over when I got the phone call.” In that moment I put everything that’s happened aside and surprisingly am glad to see him.

“Oh okay. I’m still waiting for the doctor.” Just then a doctor walks in.

“Well hi there Andrew. It looks like you surprised us all. Let me do a quick check up and we can go from there.”

I watch nervously as Dr. Jones goes through his routine. He looks up with a smile and the weight on my heart drops.

“Well, from what I can see he seems to be fine physically but we’ll still have to run some tests to make sure his brain didn’t face any damage.” Dr. Jones puts his light in his pocket.

“Thank you so much, Dr. Jones.” I’m beaming.

“Yes, of course. Even though it’s been some time Andrew woke up fairly fast for someone with his injuries. Would you like to wait for his mother to be back to proceed with the tests or start now?”

“We can start now,” I respond almost immediately.

“Well actually since Mr. Edwardson is the father therefore legal guardian present it’s up to him to decide.”

“Oh. Well, Jacob?” I’m disappointed but I look over to Jacob.

He hasn’t said a word since the doctor came in I actually think he’s in more shock than I am. I may hate his guts but this is the first time he’s seen Andrew awake so it must be a lot to take in.

“Um yes, now is fine.” After what feels like forever Jacob finally responds.

****Later that day** **

****POV Jacob** **

He’s actually awake.

My son. The kid that I left behind, the kid I came back for, the child of the woman I still love is awake and I’m still here.

The doctors have been running so many tests all day from blood tests to CT scans but there are no results yet. Just before all of this, I had professed my undead love for Natasha and she let me down. I understand why but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt. Andrew’s awake now. They both need me and I need to put away any feelings I might have to do what they both need me for or else it’s going to be our marriage all over again and I can’t do that.

****POV Natasha** **

My son is awake and I’m stuck in California. I thought of calling Elise but after what happened earlier I didn’t think it would be the best idea. I called Jacob but it went straight to voicemail and now I'm in California uninformed other than the one short phone call from the nurse.

I was going to fly out right away but there were no available flights until tomorrow morning and right now I think I’m about to go insane. Any mother with a child in the hospital would understand.

My co-workers have been really understanding about my situation and the director even gave me a few days off to check up on Andrew so the only thing in my way is that there are no available flights back home.

There’s been so much on my mind lately and I don’t know how to face all of this. The couple weeks I've been here has been a nice escape from reality but now I have to face all of it. Right now I need to focus on my son. No matter who loves me and who I like, right now and always, it’s about Andrew. Everything I’ve done was in his best interest even if it hurt me on the way. The only thing that’s kept me from beating myself up for everything that’s happened is because of him and now he’s awake.

****The next day** **

I look out the window as the plane finally lands. I rush over to baggage claim and quickly flag a taxi.

When the taxi pulls up to the hospital it feels like the day I got the call about the car crash all over again. I’m so out of it that I almost forget my bags.

I open the door to Andrew’s room and walk in.

“Natasha” Jacob and Elise look up and say my name in unison.

Nobody makes a move so I rush over to Andrew’s side. Elise moves over so I can stand closer and tears are streaming down my face.

“Hey, Andrew. Mommy is here now and I won’t leave your side. I know everything might hurt now but it’s all going to be okay. Just hang in there, my man.” Andrew nods in response.

I finally look up to see an awkward duo looking at me.

“So, what did the doctor say? Also, you two choose now to not answer my calls?” I don’t know if I'm actually mad or just frustrated with the two of them.

“You called?” Elise talks first.

“No, but you.” I look over to Jacob.

“I had no idea you called Natasha. I must’ve left my phone in the car when I rushed over. I assumed Elise or the doctor had called you.” Jacob looked genuinely apologetic.

“No, no one told me anything other than that my son was awake so I was left to fill in the blanks myself. But anyways I’m here now. So what did Dr. Jones say?”

“He’s been running some tests and the results should be back soon but we’ve all just been waiting too.” Elise’s eyes turn soft.

“Oh okay. Then we wait. Has Andrew said anything since he woke up?” I realized he hasn’t said anything since I got here.

“No, he’s just been nodding his head yes or no. The doctor did say there’s a possibility he faced some brain damage from the coma so it could be one of those.” Jacob answered shoving his hands into his pocket.

Just then someone knocks on the door.

“Come in.” I turned to the door.

“Hello, Ms. Negovanlis. They said you just arrived which is perfect timing because the scans just came back.” Dr. Jones walked in with a few scans in his hands.

“Oh, that’s good. Is Andrew okay?”

“For the most part yes.” Oh no, something’s not okay.

“Like I had mentioned before it’s possible that Andrew would face some deficits if he woke up and it looks like his Broca’s area was damaged. It’s possible it was due to the accident itself or from the coma but it’s the part of his brain that helps him form speech. However, his scans show that it isn’t extensive so it’s possible for him to regain partial or even all of his speech with speech therapy.” I finally release the breath I’ve been holding in.

“It also looks like he’s acquired an infection from one of his internal damages but I’ll give him some antibiotics and he should be fine.”

“So Andrew is okay?” I’ve stopped crying but my voice is still a bit shaky.

“Yes, your son is okay. Because of the infection we still want to keep him here a night or two but once he’s been cleared he’s good to go home.” Dr. Jones looks at me with a smile.

“Thank you so much for everything.”

Dr. Jones leaves and I look over to see that Andrew has fallen asleep. His external injuries seem to be healed and all I can see is the pure beautiful face of my baby boy.

After a minute I turn around to see that Elise and Jacob are once again just awkwardly standing there.

“You guys can go home tonight and get some sleep. I got it from here.” I’m exhausted but I just need to be with my son right now.

“Are you sure you’re okay by yourself right now?” Jacob takes a few steps forward.

“Yeah yeah I’ll be fine.” I wave my hand dismissively.

“Well call us if anything changes or if you need anything.” “Elise walks over to grab her coat.

“Yeah, will do. You guys have a good rest of your days.”

****POV Jacob** **

Ever since Natasha came back I could feel the tension between all three of us but there’s nothing any of us can do about it right now. Right now Elise and I just need to go home and give Natasha her space.

“Hey, do you want a ride home since we’re going to the same place anyway? If you want we can grab dinner on the way.” I offer because I know I need to stay civil.

“Um sure.” Elise seems a bit distracted but she’s not harsh as usual.

We go pick up a pizza and head home. The whole car ride is complete utter awkward silence.

“I should’ve known you wanted her back all along.” Elise is looking out the window as she finally breaks the silence.

I should be taken back but I'm not.

“Honestly that wasn’t why I came back. I meant it when I said I came back to be a part of Andrew’s life. When I finally got here and saw Natasha I started realizing everything I let slip through my fingers. I’m not trying to force my way into Natasha’s life I promise but I need her to know so if I do have a shot she knows.” I look over to see a glimpse of disappointment on Elise’s face.

“I know you love her Elise.” Elise is looking at me now.

“I don’t know what’s happened between you two and what’s not and it’s not my place to snoop but I see the way you look at her and the way you care for her. Not even the worlds bestest friend could look at someone like that. I know because I used to look at her like that. Before our life became a mess. I don’t know how Natasha feels but I know it’s something more than just friends.”

“Jacob…” Elise tries to interject.

“Wait let me finish.” Elise stops talking again.

“I’m not trying to win her back. And I’m sure as hell not trying to steal her from you. I know you hate me and all but I just want her to be happy. I could only hope that that would be with me but you and I both know that’s not happening. I’m always going to love her but I can’t change the past and try to just repaint.” I revert my eyes back onto the road and stop talking.

“I don’t hate you. I mean I do but I don’t think it’s with the right intentions. Ever since you’ve come back all you’ve done is look out for both Andrew and Natasha and I’ve just given you crap. I’m actually surprised you don’t hate me. But thank you. I never let you explain yourself and just jumped to conclusion. I don’t know if Natasha told you but my mom died in a car accident when I was younger so this whole this I haven’t been dealing with well. And I just came to my own realization for whatever feelings I have for Natasha.” Elise is looking down at her hands playing with one of her rings.

“Oh. She never told me. I’m sorry. I didn’t realize what you were going through.”

“That doesn’t mean it justifies my behavior. So I’m sorry for giving you shit.” Elise is looking over at me with an apologetic look now.

“All is forgiven.” I pull into the driveway and turn off the car.


	11. My New Campaign LISTEN

Hi Everyone! So I know this isn't an update but this is something important to me so if you'd just tune in for a sec. 

About an year ago I started writing a book for myself called Listen. It was called Listen because I felt as though there were some things I had to say but never got heard. I felt all alone and lost so I wrote it all down. I had written these excerpts at a time of desperation and never looked back until now. Recently one of you readers (you know who you are ;)) mentioned that you would like to read other works of mine and that's when I thought of Listen. I had no intention of publicly releasing it anytime soon but I knew I wanted to do something with it so I decided to turn it into the LISTEN campaign. I could go on about it but here's a short summary. It's pretty much a campaign to encourage people with mental illnesses or even daily struggles that it's ok to be vulnerable and speak up and that there will be people to listen. I want this to be a community before a campaign and I'm telling all of you because I need your help. So many of you have been loyal and supportive of my works the past few months and I had a small favor to ask all of you. If you would be interested in supporting my campaign please check out this link: https://listeningtothesound.weebly.com/ 

You can also follow it on Instagram - @wewill_listen, Twitter - @wewill_listen and like it on Facebook - Listen

Please share this with your friends and family to spread the word!

You can also help me get the word out by signing my LISTEN petition here: https://www.change.org/p/me-start-a-conversation-about-mental-health 

Just to get your attention I'll post one of the excerpts on the website before.

Disclaimer: This is a raw excerpt so no editing has been done.

**"I'm Ok"**

Did you mean it when you asked if I was ok? Because I didn’t mean it when I said I was. I wanted you to mean it. But I was afraid you wouldn’t so I couldn’t tell you the truth. I wanted you to be the one to listen but I was scared you wouldn’t so I kept my mouth shut. But now I’ll tell you the truth. I’m not ok. I’m not doing fine. I’m telling you now but you’re not hearing me are you. See that’s what I was scared of. I guess you didn’t really hear me in the first place. But I’m not ok and you’ll never know. You’ll tell me you meant it but I doubt I’ll ever believe you. I don’t blame you anymore. Because I guess it’s not your fault that I’m not ok. Not your fault that I don’t believe you. But it is someone’s fault. Someone asked me if I was ok once. Told me they meant it. Spoiler alert, they didn’t. It would be so easy to say it was their fault. I’ll tell you that now all I see is their face when you ask me how I am. All I remember is when they didn’t mean it. So tell me now do you mean it? No forget it it’s not worth it. You can try to convince me all you want but will I believe you? No I guess not. Maybe I’ll tell you I’m not ok but do I expect you to do something about it? Probably not. I wanted to tell you that I was dying inside today. But I guess today you seemed less sincere then usual. I wanted to tell you I couldn’t do it. I wanted to tell you that I couldn’t stop. That the tremor had returned. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t get myself to tell you that I had to be your burden for a moment. I couldn’t bear to expect someone to listen. If I did then I saw them. I know you meant it now. But it’s too late. I pushed you so far away that now you got tired of meaning it. You gave up. Am I surprised? Not really. I guess this time it’s my fault. My fault that I didn’t believe you the first hundred times. Now that you’ve asked for the 101st time you didn’t mean it. You wanted to but you got tired too. If you asked again I’d say I was ok. I think I am in this moment. But I’m sorry I made you wait around.

To find more excerpts and more information about my campaign check out the link! Thank you all for your attention and I hope this wasn't a waste of you time.

P.s. I will post an update very soon :).

\- B


	12. Chapter 9: Hardest Thing Is Letting Go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey everyone! So this chapter was a hard one to write and you will have to forgive me for the mess I've made but I promise from here it only gets better. Like they say, it's the storm before the calm. Hope you enjoy the chapter!
> 
> \- B

****Two days later** **

****POV Natasha** **

In the past two days, Elise and Jacob have been the most civil I’ve seen them. I don’t know what happened while I was gone but I’m not complaining. The last thing I need on my mind is them at each other’s throat.

Andrew, on the other hand, hasn’t been doing so well. He woke up three days ago but due to an infection he’s been sick and seems like he’s only getting worse. The doctor gave him several different medications but none of them have worked. If he doesn’t get better in the next 24 hours he has to go under surgery again.

I’ve been with Andrew the last two days. Elise and Jacob come by to see him but leave for the night. They usually come together and leave together, probably easier with one car, so I haven’t talked to Elise about our phone call yet and it’s been on my mind alongside many other things.

“Hey” I look up to see Elise.

“Oh hey. Is Jacob here too?” Elise walks in and closes the door behind her.

“No, he had to take care of work stuff so I’m here by myself today.” She takes a seat on the other side of Andrew’s bed.

“How’s Andrew?”

“Worse. They’re trying a new medication but if that doesn’t work then he might have to go back to surgery.”

“ I’m sorry Natasha. I know this must be hard for you. I wish there was something I could do.” Elise reaches over the bed to grab my hand.

For a second I look down at her hand on mine and look back up at her. Elise slowly pulls her hand away.

“How are you doing?” Elise sinks into her seat.

She looks down at her hands and starts playing with her rings.

“I’m sorry Natasha. For calling you can then abruptly hanging up. You’ve already got a lot to deal with without me being over sensitive.” She’s looking back up at me now.

“I will say it was a bit sudden but it’s okay. It must not be easy for you with the accident and Jacob back in town. I wish this was under better circumstances and maybe things would be different but I have to press pause on my love life and focus on Andrew.”

“I get it. It just wasn’t good timing. Maybe once this is all over we can revisit it. I also talked with Jacob. If I’m being honest I was bit jealous. But it wasn’t fair to either him or you considering neither one of you had any idea. I understand why Jacob is here now and I’ll stop being stubborn and stop trying to push him out.”

“I’m glad you guys are friends now. It means a lot to me that you guys can finally get along.” A smile grows on my face.

“I just want you to know though Natasha I l---“

Right then Andrew wakes up coughing.

“Andrew, are you alright buddy?” Elise reaches over to put up his bed.

Andrew shakes his head no as he continues to cough violently.

“Oh my god he’s coughing up blood.” I look over to see Andrew’s gown covered in red.

I run out into the hall to find a nurse.

“Nurse! My son needs assistance please!”

Shortly after a nurse comes in and swiftly takes Andrew away saying he needs to go into surgery right away.

“No. I just got him back.” Elise rushes over to my side and I start sobbing into her shoulder.

I call Jacob and he arrives shortly after.

After what feels like ages a doctor comes out.

“You are you Andrew’s mother?” I nod quickly.

“Hello, I’m Dr. Adler. I’m the one who operated on Andrew. I’m sorry to inform you that Andrew didn’t make it.” This can’t be happening.

“The infection had spread to his lungs and around his heart. This weakened his heart which failed during the surgery. I’m very sorry for your loss.” Dr. Adler turns around and starts walking away.

“Wait! Can we see his body?” Jacob rushes towards him.

“Yes. A nurse will be with you with further details.”

He’s gone. Just like that my baby boy is gone.

Tears have yet to fall down my face. I’m looking towards the direction the doctor walked away and I just stand there.

****Two days later** **

Jacob and I get in the car to head to the funeral. Elise said she would meet us there so we leave first.

We decided to go with an open casket. We wanted to be able to see our baby boy’s face one last time before we said goodbye. Jacob holds my hand as we walk into the church.

My parents are here.

The last time I saw them was when I told them I was getting married and my father angrily stormed out of the house. I haven’t talked to them since. They didn’t even come to Andrew’s birth yet here they are at his funeral.

“My parents are here.” I look over to Jacob.

“I know. I invited them.” Jacob looks into the church and back at me.

“You did what?” I take a step back.

“Well it was more like I called them to let them know what happened and they showed up.” Jacob grabs my hand again.

“And you didn’t think of telling me this?”

“I didn’t think they’d actually show up. No offense.”

“None taken. But now I’ve got to deal with them too. This is just going great.”

I was never close with my parents but Jacob stayed in touch with my mother. He tried to arrange a get together with my parents a few times when we were married but they always bailed out. I figured after our divorce he would’ve stopped talking to them.

Jacob and I walk past my parents without saying hi and take our seats. Shortly later Elise arrives and sits next to me.

“My parents are here.” I turn around slightly and look at Elise.

“Your parents? I thought you didn’t talk to them.” Elise looked surprised.

“I don’t. But apparently, Jacob does.”

“Oh. Well, maybe this is your chance to mend things with them.” Elise relaxes a bit.

“At my son’s funeral? The one that they haven’t even met before?” I raise my eyebrows.

“I know this isn’t the most ideal situation but they came. That has to mean something.” Elise puts a hand on my shoulder.

“Fine. But if they’re just here to make my life miserable again I’m sending them on their way.”

“Deal.”

The funeral starts and Elise gives a tearful eulogy.

We planned a small reception for close friends and family where I finally ran into my parents.

“Natasha.” My mother looks at me with pitiful eyes.

“Mother.” I greet her in the most resentful way possible.

“I’m sorry about Andrew. He’s a beautiful boy.” My mother tries to reach for my hand.

“Oh because you would know. You and father dodged me for the past five years and now you show up at my dead son’s funeral and have the audacity to say he’s a beautiful boy?” I scoff in response and take a step back.

“Natasha you have to understand…” My mother drops her reaching hand.

“There’s nothing to understand. You walked out of my life and didn’t even look back. You don’t just show up like this and expect me to “understand”.” My blood is starting to boil.

“What your mother is trying to say is…” My father finally speaks up.

“No father. You don’t get to say anything. You’re worst than mother. You never loved me for who I was and you’re the one who got mother to turn her back on me. I don’t owe either of you anything.” I start walking away.

“Wait Natasha just hear us out. You’re right I don’t deserve your attention and you don’t owe us anything but we here now and want to explain. We are so sorry for everything.” For the first time in my life, my father sounds desperate.

“You guys turned your backs on me. Now you can to see how that feels yourselves.” I turn back around and go looking for Elise.

“So? How’d it go?” Elise stops talking to Johnny’s mom who walks away.

“As expected. They want to explain themselves and my father actually apologized. As if I’ll hear them out.” I reach over to grab a cup of water.

“Well, it’s up to you Natasha. You get to do what you want right now.” Elise gives me a half smile.

“Thanks, Elise.”

Jacob walks over and stands next to Elise.

“You shouldn’t have called them.” I look over to Jacob.

“I assume things didn’t go well with your parents.”

“No,” Elise responds for me.

“I’m sorry Nat. I know things are bad between you and your parents but I just thought you could use some parental support during this time.”

“I know you meant well Jacob. But it was still a bad idea.”

“Okay. If you want we can leave now. You’re not really required to stay.” Jacob reaches out his hand.

I take it and we head towards the car.

With all the people I had to talk to I didn’t get a chance to let all of this sink in. Once we got in the car I break down. Jacob reached over and grabs my hand. The rest of the car ride is silent.


	13. Chapter 10: Time Will Heal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey Everyone! Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays for those who don't celebrate Christmas. I thought since it's the holidays this would be my gift for you. Also with how I left things last update I owed you guys this much. I have a few more AN at the end so stick around for those and enjoy this chapter!
> 
> \- B

**4 months later**

**POV Elise**

It's been 4 months since Andrew died and things are normal. Almost too normal. Jacob stuck around to help Natasha and because of his promotion, he was able to work here. Natasha almost immediately flew out to L.A. to continue working and just recently wrapped her movie. Jacob and I are getting worried. Natasha's just immersed herself in her work without actually dealing with what happened. With that, she's also been super independent. She prefers to do everything by herself whether it be going grocery shopping or going out on the weekend. She's here but it's like she's not.

"Hey, I'm going out. Don't wait up." Natasha grabs her keys and walks out the door.

I should be glad that she hasn't put her life on pause and just broken down or become a sad drunk but this is almost as equally concerning.

The only time she's truly shown red flags was when she left to go out and didn't come back until the next morning.

**_Flashback to two weeks ago_ **

_"I'm going out." Natasha was grabbing her coat._

_"Let me go with you." I get up from the table._

_"No, it's fine. I'm meeting a friend." Disappointed I sat back down._

_"Oh, okay. Well, have fun." Natasha gave me a half smile and headed out._

_"At least she's spending time with people." I turn around to see Jacob coming down the stairs._

_"Yeah, I guess so. But she hasn't spent any time with either of us since, you know. Not that she's required to but I'm concerned." Jacob grab_ _bed_ _a beer and s_ _at_ _down across from me._

_"Yeah, I know. Andrew was her world. Without her parents, Andrew was her only biological family she could rely on. I know that even after our divorce Andrew was what kept her truly sane. We just need to give her time to heal."_

_"Okay." I sighed and went back to working._

**_1am_ **

_I heard the fridge opening and closing so I made my way down the stairs._

_"Natasha?"_

_"Nope, just me." Jacob had poured himself a cup of water._

_"She's still not home?" I was leaning against the doorframe half asleep._

_"No."_

_"It's past midnight. She never comes home this late." I was getting concerned now._

_"She did say she was out with a friend. She's a grown woman she'll take care of herself. She just needs some space." Jacob started heading back upstairs._

_"Okay." I yawned and headed back to bed myself._

_The next morning_

_I was working at the kitchen counter while Jacob was cooking breakfast when Natasha finally came home._

_She was wearing a different shirt from the one night before._

_"Hey---" I was about to ask her questions but she just waved her hand dismissively._

_She went upstairs and I heard the shower turn on._

_"Wait, is she dating someone?" I raised my eyebrows at Jacob._

_"I dunno." Jacob just shrugged and went on cooking._

_I was surprised by Jacob's lack of concern. I figured since he was still in love with Natasha he'd care a bit more._

_"I know what you're thinking Elise. Why don't I care more about the fact that Natasha is possibly sleeping with an anonymous person?" Guess he read my mind._

_"I still love her. That won't change but if this is what's keeping her from breaking apart than we just have to let her do what she wishes."_

_"Do you guys always talk behind my back when I'm not around?" I turn_ _ed_ _around to see Natasha walking the stairs._

_She grab_ _bed_ _a mug out of a cabinet and pour_ _ed_ _herself a cup of coffee._

_"I'm fine. You guys don't have to keep worrying about me." Natasha lean_ _ed_ _against the counter while drinking her coffee._

_"Where were you last night?" I asked in a concerning voice._

_"At a friend's." Natasha just nonchalantly shrugged her shoulders._

_"Yeah, we got that. What friend?"_

_"I met her at a bar a couple of weeks ago." Natasha's expression didn't change at all._

_"Blonde or brunette?" Jacob asked as he brought over our plates._

_"Redhead," Natasha smirked as she sat down._

_"Never thought you were a redhead kinda gal." Jacob let out a small laugh._

_"I'm not but she's fun so I don't care." Natasha shrugged nonchalantly. Again._

_"Are you guys serious? You're just going to joke about some redhead you met at a bar?" I accusingly looked at both of them._

_"Relax cupcake, it's not like I'm serial dating. Or dating for that matter. Just having a little fun is all." I couldn't believe the words coming out of her mouth._

_"You know what forget it. If you're going to go out and sleep around what do I care. It's not like you're my best friend who's never around at home and never wants to spend time with either of us but definitely wants to sleep around with some redhead you met at a bar." I closed my laptop frustrated._

_"Someone's cranky this morning," Natasha smirked and started eating._

_We all ate in silence the rest of the morning._

**POV Natasha**

I'm fine. My son died but life goes on so I'm fine. Elise and Jacob have been walking on eggshells around me ever since. Elise more than Jacob. Elise finally broke that day when I didn't come home. I know I should feel bad but if I start to feel bad then all the other emotions will start flooding in so I couldn't care less what Elise thinks right now.

Ever since my movie wrapped I haven't been doing much other than going out. I thought I deserved a break from working all the time but my agent called and said he has an audition for me so I'm getting ready to head out.

I go upstairs to grab my purse and I see Elise walk out of Andrew's room carrying a box of things.

"What are you doing?" I stop and turn towards Elise.

"Cleaning out Andrew's room. You were supposed to but you know, you were kinda busy going out all day." Right.

"Leave it. I'll do it when I come home today." I turn back towards my room.

"Natasha, his stuff has been just sitting there for the past 4 months. I'm not doing anything today so I'll just clean it out." I turn back around.

"Fine." I go to my room and grab my purse.

I start heading back downstairs and see a picture on the stairs. Elise must've dropped it on her way down. I pick it up and it's a picture of Andrew and me on his 3rd birthday eating ice cream. Without realizing I sit down.

"Natasha?" I look up to see Elise standing in front of me.

"He had asked for strawberry that day but they ran out and I had to get him chocolate instead. He was crying like crazy until you went out and found him strawberry ice cream. I think it's the brightest he's ever smiled." I chuckled at the memory.

"Yeah, I remember. His eyes turned bright and he was laughing again in no time." Elise was now sitting next to me.

"It's okay to feel things, Natasha. What you went through is unimaginable. You don't have to just bottle it all up and shut yourself off from the rest of the world." Elise's hand slid across my back.

"What do you want me to do? Break down crying because my baby boy is dead?" I turned to look at Elise.

"He's dead. Andrew's actually gone." All the tears I was holding in for the past 4 months began to flood down my face.

I leaned into Elise's shoulder and started sobbing uncontrollably.

"He's g-g-gone. W-what am I d-doing with m-my life?" I started blabbering in between sobs.

"Shhh, it's okay Natasha. You just need to let yourself feel." Elise started rubbing my back soothing me.

After staying like that for a good 10 minutes I finally stop crying and sit up.

"I'm sorry Elise. I'm sorry for being so distant and making a mess out of my life."

"Hey, no matter what you're going through and whoever you're with I'll always be here for you to come back home to." Elise put her hands on my face and wipes a stray tear.

"I ended things with the redhead." My voice lowered.

My eyes wander to her lips.

Elise moved closer ever so slightly.

"Elise?" Hearing the front door open and close I pulled away quickly.

"Oh, was I interrupting something? Sorry." Jacob walked over to the bottom of the stairs.

"Um, no. I was just heading out." I cleared my throat and stand up.

I take a quick glance at Elise and head out to my audition, which at this point I am extremely late for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I hope y'all enjoyed this update cause it will be a bit until the next. I'll be out of town for the next few days and then school starts again. As I promised I updated more frequently during break so I hope you can bare with me while my schedule shifts a bit during the next few weeks. Second thing is I wanted to let you all know that I have decided that this book will be 30 chapters long. I do have a plan to continue on with a volume II but we'll cross that bridge when we get there. Lastly for those of you who would like to support me or continue to support my LISTEN project there is something you could do for. I am looking for people to send me pictures of them holding up a piece a paper or a sign saying #wewilllisten so that I can put them on my website. Your face doesn't have to be in it but it would be great if it was. Those can be sent to me through Wattpad or sent to my Instagram @wewill_listen or at Twitter @wewill_listen. If you would like to do more to support this project please let me know because there are many other things you could do. Thanks for listening to this really long AN and I hope y'all have a great rest of your holidays!  
> \- B


	14. Chapter 11: More To Us

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey Everyone I'm back! Happy New Years! I hope you're having a good start to the new year and if not maybe this update will help :). Enjoy!
> 
> \- B

**POV Elise**

“You were about to kiss her and I totally ruined it.” I walk over to the couch and plop down.

“Yes. You totally ruined it.” I sigh and look over to Jacob.

“It’s okay though. This way I can actually do it right.” Jacob walks over.

“Well if you need any help let me know. I was with her for five years.” He sits down on the coffee table in front of me.

“Yeah, and how well did that work out?” I smirk at Jacob.

“Ouch. But very true.” Jacob jokingly puts a hand on his heart.

“If I need your assistance I'll let you know but this I think I’ll handle.” Jacob pats my knee and goes upstairs.

I actually have a shot now. Would this be considered taking advantage of her if she’s this vulnerable? I mean I did wait 4 months for this moment. Ugh, I did hope it was under better circumstances. I need to take things slow. It’s only fair for her even if it’s going to be torturous for me. The last thing I want is to move things along too fast and push her away.

**POV Natasha**

I’m 30 minutes late for my audition but luckily they’re behind on schedule so I’m technically not late. Great. Now I have 15 minutes to sit here and think about what happened or should I say what didn’t happen.

“Natasha?” I look up to see the redhead walked towards me.

“Sharon? What are you doing here?” I don’t know if I’m more surprised to see her here or uncomfortable to see her after everything that’s happened.

“I’m one of the directors of this movie. I assume you’re here for an audition?” The redhead is now standing in front of me.

I met her at the bar shortly after I wrapped my last movie. I was slightly drunk and I may have been all over her without even knowing who she was. For all she knew I was an actress who couldn’t keep her life together. We hooked up a few times after that but I never knew what she did and who she was outside the girl I met at the bar.

“I didn’t know you were a director.” A bit surprised I slowly stand up.

“Didn’t think it was a necessary piece of information I needed to share in between making out.” She gives me a mischievous smirk.

“Um, I guess so.” I try not to look embarrassed.

“Well, I better head inside. It was nice seeing you again. I hope your audition goes well.” She gives me her charming smile and disappears behind the door.

Great. Just when things are happening between Elise and I this happens.

While I was away working and well at bars I didn’t forget about what Elise had said to me several weeks before. In the moment I needed to get my mind off of things and no matter how emotionless I was I couldn’t just use Elise so I met Sharon. With her, it was no commitment just fun. I never meant to hurt Elise in the process but when I saw how frustrated she was about my “friend” I felt a twinge of guilt. I ended things with Sharon the next day and she didn’t ask any questions. I never told her that my 4 year old son had died and that I live with my ex-husband who still loves me and my best friend who’s also possibly falling for me. When did my life become a reality show?

**After the audition**

I pull up into our driveway and head inside.

“Hey…” Elise looks up from her laptop.

“Hey…” I put my keys and coat on the counter and slowly walk over.

“Um, how was the audition?” Elise slowly closes her laptop and turns to look at me.

“It was good.” I run my hand through my hair and take a seat across from her.

“So… about earlier.” Elise is talking awfully slow.

“Yeah about that---”

“I think we should take things slowly.” Elise blurts out.

“Not because I don’t want to be with you because trust me that's all I've been thinking about but I don’t think it would be fair of me to expect you to be ready to start something.” I cut off Elise before she can continue.

“No Elise I understand. I was going to say we should take it slow too. I want something to work for us. I really do. But I don’t know if I can invest myself in a committed relationship right now without hurting you in the process.” I can see the disappointment but also understanding in Elise’s eyes.

“If I have to wait an eternity for you I will.” Elise gives me a warm smile.

“Eternity is an awfully long time. Let's just go with now for now.” I chuckle and lower my head to the side.

Elise reaches over and grabs my hand.

“I’ll always be by your side every step of the way. I don’t care if it’s as your best friend or as your girlfriend I will love you.”

Elise as my girlfriend.

Before it didn’t seem like something tangible but now I’ve got something to look forward to.

**POV Elise**

“Jacob and I are going out to dinner with a couple of his co-workers. Do you want to join us?” I take my hand back and start getting up.

Natasha is hesitant for a second as she looks down at her hands.

“Yeah, I’d like that.” She looks up and me and gives me a soft smile.

“Really? Well, I’m meeting them there at 7 so if you want I can drive you.”

“Sounds good.” She’s full-on smiling now.

This is the first time I’ve seen her genuinely smile since Andrew’s death and for once I feel like things will be okay.

I head upstairs to figure out something to wear.

 

 ** _To Jacob:_** _Natasha’s coming to dinner with us tonight!_

I set my phone down on top of the drawer and walk over to my closet. After a few minutes, I hear my phone vibrate.

 

 **_From Jacob:_ ** _Actually??_

 **_From Jacob:_ ** _Well I guess I’m not complaining_

 **_From Jacob:_ ** _Is she coming with you?_

 

 **_To Jacob:_ ** _Yeah. We’ll meet you there at 7_

 

I go back into my closet looking for something to wear.

**6:30pm**

“Hey, you ready to leave?” I grab my keys and wait at the door.

“Yeah, let me just grab my coat.” Natasha comes does the stairs.

This is just a casual outing with friends but she looks stunning. She’s wearing a pair of black skinny jeans with a pair of ankle boots and a simple white v neck and never have I seen someone look that good in a white v neck before.

“Are you just going to keep staring or are we going to head out.” Natasha puts her coat on and smirks at me.

“Um yeah, let's go.” I quickly turn around and open the door.

We pull up at a sushi restaurant that Jacob said was to die for and walk in.

**POV Jacob**

I was surprised at first when Elise texted me saying Natasha was coming too. But I’m glad she decided to finally join us at our outings. I’m here with my co-workers Annie and Matt who Elise has met before but they’ve never met Natasha before so I hope this goes well. They worked at my old location with me so they know who Natasha is and what happened with Andrew so they understand why they’ve never met her before.

“Looks like Elise and Natasha are here.” Annie nudges me to look up.

“Dude your ex-wife is hot.” Matt blurts out.

“Matt!” Annie slaps Matt on his arm.

“Hahaha yeah, she is.” I just smirk in response.

“Hey, Annie!” Elise walks over to give Annie a hug.

“Matt.” She smirks at Matt and gives him a hug too.

“And Jacob.” I stand up to give her a hug.

“Hey Nat, I’m glad you decided to come out tonight.” I awkwardly shove my hands in my pocket.

“Yeah, well I thought it was about time I spent some time with you guys.” Natasha gives me a smile as she puts her coat on her chair.

“Well Natasha, meet Annie and Matt. They’re my co-workers.”

“Nice to meet you guys, I’m Natasha.” She reaches over to shake both of their hands.

“We’ve heard all about you!” Matt exclaims.

Annie nudges Matt in his ribs.

“Ow!”

“Oh have you now?” Natasha raises her eyebrows and looks over at me.

“Sorry about Matt he doesn’t have much of a filter when he talks.” Annie glares at Matt.

“Haha, it’s okay. I understand.” Natasha responds lightly.

“I’ve been working with them ever since I moved out after our divorce so I may have mentioned you a few times.” I try to make it sound casual.

“It’s okay Jacob. It's not like I’ve got anything to hide.” Natasha gives me a reassuring smile.

“Okay, well then should we order ‘cause I’m starving.” Elise speaks up from her seat.

“Of course you are.” Natasha rolls her eyes at Elise.

“Hey! I may be small but it takes a lot to keep this little body moving.” Elise sits up in her seat.

“Yeah yeah. Just order your food already.” Natasha picks up her menu and starts looking at the options.

After we finished eating we decided to head over to Blue Bear Café to grab some coffee.

“Drinks are on me,” Annie exclaimed as we all walked in.

We all ordered and found a seat while Annie paid. A few minutes later Annie walked over with all five drinks in her hands.

“So how’d you two meet?” Matt asks as he sipped his hot chocolate.

“We met on set where we played best friends and eventually became best friends in real life.” Elise beamed as she put her arms around Natasha’s shoulders

“What’s it like living in the same house as your ex-husband and girlfriend?” Matt casually asked.

“We’re not together.” Natasha was quick to answer.

“Oh sorry for assuming. Just thought since you guys live together and act like you’re dating figured you guys were together.”

“Things are just complicated.” Elise gave a pained smile.

I guess Elise didn’t make a move when Natasha came home today. I looked over to Elise to see her reaction. She seemed slightly hurt. Probably not by the fact that they aren’t together but because Natasha was so quick to respond.

After clearing that up the rest of the evening went smoothly. Natasha seemed to like my friends and they seem to like her so I’m glad. Hopefully, she’ll be willing to come out to spend time with us again.

At around 10 we decided to all head back home.


	15. Chapter 12: Interruptions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey everyone! Knowing that I have a super busy week this coming week I thought I'd update a bit sooner than Monday. While writing yesterday my computer charger broke so I thought I wouldn't get this chapter up in time but thankfully I was able to find a spare charger. For those of you who were wondering what Jacob looked like I imagined him to be played by Chris Wood. I know there is a lot of hate for his character Mon el on Supergirl and other stuff but please no hate here and know that I'm not trying to offend anyone. Now, because I love y'all I thought I'd make this chapter extra long. You guys better love this chapter cause I really enjoyed writing it!
> 
> \- B

**3 weeks later**

**POV Natasha**

For the past 3 weeks, Elise and I have been making an effort to spend time together. After my break down on the stairs, I started going to therapy three times a week. I felt like I owed it to both myself and Elise. Elise has been trying hard to give me the space I need so the least I could do was put in the effort of getting better. Also, with all this pent-up emotion I wasn’t able to properly grieve Andrew. The first week of therapy it got pretty messy. I cried myself to sleep every night and each time Elise was there to wrap her warm arms around my shaking body. The second week was about learning how to communicate with Jacob again. I realized that in the 4 months I was distant I disregarded the fact that Jacob lost a child too. I never asked him how he was doing and just expected him to be fine. So, for the third through fifth sessions, Jacob went with me. This week Elise has been going with me and waiting in the lobby.

“You ready to go?” I close the door behind me as I walk towards Elise.

“Yeah.” She puts down the magazine she was reading and stands up.

We walk to the parking lot and Elise opens the passenger seat door for me.

“Thanks.” I give her a small smile and get it.

Elise just smiles back and walks over to her side of the car.

“So how was today’s session?” Elise starts the engine.

“It was good. We actually talked about you.” I look over to Elise.

“Oh really?” She raises her eyebrows eyes still on the road.

“Yeah. My shrink was asking if I started seeing people again. I said not quite but that there was you,” I could see a smile form on Elise’s face.

“So, should I be worried about what you’re telling her about me?” Elise was now smirking and looking over at me.

“Well, I told her that you were a beautiful woman inside and out and has stuck by me through thick and thin. Also that you’ve been amazing enough to wait for me to be ready for a relationship. One that I really want but is scared of.” I looked down at my hands as I say the last part.

Elise reaches over the console and grabs my hand.

She stops at a red light and looks over at me.

“Natasha, you never told me. I knew you wanted to take things slow but I didn’t know that you were scared. If I’m being honest I’m a bit scared too. There are so many what ifs but whenever I look at you I know anything with you will be worth whatever I have to face.” While still holding my hand she starts driving again.

“Thank you, Elise. I want us to be able to do things like a normal couple but there’s a constant worry that I’m going to mess things up because I jumped in too soon.”

“You take all the time you need. I meant it when I said I’d wait an eternity if it meant being with you.”

“And I say again, eternity is an awfully long time.” I smile and kiss the back of Elise’s hand.

**POV Elise**

The rest of the car ride is small talk. We get home and head inside.

“You guys are home.” Jacob makes his way down the stairs.

“Yes, we are," Natasha responds as she takes off her coat.

“I was thinking of making dinner. What are you guys planning on doing tonight?” Jacobs walks over to the fridge and opens it.

“Well, Natasha and I were thinking of ordering take out and watching Netflix.” Natasha walks over to the fridge too.

“You want to join us?” Natasha asks Jacob.

Jacob looks over at me for a second and responds hesitantly. “Um, you know what I think I’ll just go out for dinner and meet up with some friends.” Jacob starts heading back upstairs.

“Okay.” Natasha just shrugs and closes the fridge.

“I’m going to go change.” I start heading upstairs too.

“Okay.” I hear Natasha respond behind me.

“You didn’t have to do that.” I look towards and Jacob

“I just figured you guys might want the time alone.” Jacob just shrugs.

“I’m also trying to still make up for interrupting your potential first kiss.” I let out a small laugh.

 "Hahaha well, either way, thank you.”

“Thank you for what?” Natasha walks upstairs.

“Oh, nothing.” I quickly respond and Jacob hurries back into his room.

“Keeping secrets from me now? I thought it wasn’t my birthday for another 3 months.” Natasha smirks.

“No, no secrets. Just saying thank you for always being there for you.”

“Oh. Well, thanks for saying thanks.” Natasha gives me a geeky smile and walks into her room.

After I’m done changing I head back downstairs. A smile forms on my face when I see Natasha in her glasses already snuggled up on the edge of the couch.

After a minute of admiring the view, Natasha looks up and pats the couch next to her. I walk over and plop down next to her.

I turn on the TV and open Netflix.

“I’m heading out now. You two don’t get too crazy tonight.” Jacob mockingly points at the two of us.

“Bye Jacob.” Natasha rolls her eyes and gives a lighthearted laugh.

The door closes and Natasha looks over at me.

“So what are we watching?”

“Lady’s pick.” I hand her the remote.

“Wow, so generous. Well, we haven’t watched the Notebook in awhile.”

“Oh c’mon we watched that just last week!” I look over to see Natasha laughing.

“So much for lady’s choice.”

“Okay okay, whatever you want.” I just shake my head.

“I’m just teasing you. I know how much you loooove the Notebook.” I roll my eyes.

“Okay, I don’t hate it but when you watch it almost every other week you can’t blame me for getting tired of it.”

“How does one get tired of the Notebook?!” I can’t help but laugh at how adorable she is.

“Oh, now you’re laughing at me?” Natasha raises her eyebrow.

“You’re just adorable is all,” I say without thinking.

I reach over and push up Natasha’s fallen glasses and we make eye contact. We hold each others’ glance for a second and Natasha clears her throat first.

“Okay, we’re watching Almost Adults than.” Natasha turns back towards the screen.

“Ew no, I can’t watch my own film. We’re watching Silver Linings Playbook. We haven’t seen that one in awhile.” I take the remote from Natasha’s hand.

“Fine.” Natasha lets out a long sigh.

As we watch the movie I notice that Natasha and I are getting closer and closer. Halfway through the movie, Natasha is basically snuggled up against me.

“I forgot how depressing and sad Pat was.” Natasha talks to the screen.

“Well, I think there’s something beautiful about someone who’s been broken.” I look down to Natasha.

“You think?” she looks up and responds softly.

“Absolutely.”

“I know I’ve said this a thousand times but I will say it a thousand times again. Thank you, Elise. For being there for me through it all and never leaving my side no matter how far I wandered away from you. I don’t know how I got so lucky to get someone like you in my life.” Natasha turns back towards the screen and leans her head on my knee.

“And I’ve said this a thousand times and will say it a thousand times again. I’d do anything for you, Natasha. You’ve been through a lot and no matter how far you wander I know that you’ll come back no matter what.” I lean down and kiss Natasha on the head.

After the movie ends I get up to stretch my legs. I look over to check the time and it’s only 5 o’clock.

“Do you want to order some food now?” Natasha is sitting up now too.

“Yeah sure. You can choose whatever. I’m just going to run to the bathroom real quick.” I start walking towards the bathroom.

Natasha picks up the phone and calls what I assume to be a Chinese place considering she’s asking about fried rice and orange chicken.

I come back to see Natasha sitting on the couch eating ice cream out of the tub.

“I thought you just ordered food?” I ask as I go grab a spoon for myself.

“I did but I’m hungry so I got ice cream. I also got you a spoon already.” I close the drawer and walk over.

“Hahaha okay, thanks.” I laugh lightly as I take a seat next to her.

I take a bite of ice cream and get some on the corner of my mouth.

“You got some---“ Natasha waves her finger around her mouth.

“Oops” I look down to see.

“Here let me get it for you.” She reaches over and wipes it off with a finger.

Her finger on my lips sends shivers down my spine.

**POV Natasha**

After I’m done ordering our food I walk over to the freezer to get some ice cream.

I walk back over and wait for Elise on the couch.

This moment, on the couch with Elise and all these lighthearted laughs, I feel happy again. I haven’t felt like this for so long I almost forgot what it felt like to feel this way for someone. I didn’t think it was possible for me to feel like this again either. Jacob was the love of my life and when that fell apart I decided to dedicate my life to Andrew. I went on a few dates here and there but I never found the kind of love that clicks. Like a key in a lock. That is until I met Elise. I didn’t realize that that’s what I was feeling when I met her at first but I think I’m coming to that realization now. I feel something when I’m with her that I didn’t with any other person I was with.

“I thought you just ordered food?” Elise walks out of the bathroom.

“I did but I’m hungry so I got ice cream. I also got you a spoon already.” Knowing she’d want some too I grabbed her a spoon earlier.

“Hahaha okay, thanks.” I watch as she takes a seat next to me.

After she takes a bite she gets some on her mouth.

“You got some---“ I point to my own mouth

“Oops” Elise looks down as if she can see which I find adorable.

"Here let me get it for you.” I reach over and wipe it off.

Without realizing I smirk as I lick the ice cream off my finger.

Elise’s lips are insanely soft which I’m not surprised by.

My gaze wanders to her lips for a second then back to the TV.

The next thing I know is Elise’s hand on my chin turning my head and her soft lips on mine.

I’m hesitant for a second but I lean into the kiss.

In my attempt to reach over my hand falls into the tub of ice cream.

In the midst of kissing Elise, I groan and pull back.

“You okay? Oh.” Elise looks down and starts laughing hysterically.

I can’t help but laugh too.

"First Jacob now a tub of ice cream. We’ve got quite the luck.” I just shake my head.

"Hahaha, we do. Here let me get you a napkin.” Elise gets up and walks over to the kitchen.  

I get up and walk over too with my hand still in the tub of ice cream.

“It’s okay, I have to wash this off anyways.” I walk over to the sink and wash my hands.

Elise takes the ice cream and throws it in the trash.

“Well, that was a waste of ice cream,” Elise says dramatically.

“Well, we can always get more.” I dry my hands and walk over to her.

"So where did we leave off?” I smirk and raise an eyebrow.

I put one hand on the back of Elise’s neck and another on her waist and lean in.

“Wait” Elise abruptly talks and I pull back.

“What’s wrong?” I’m starting to get worried now.

“Nothing. It’s just in the car today you said you were scared but I kissed you which was a great kiss by the way but I just don’t want to keep going unless you feel comfortable.” Elise puts her hands on top of mine.

“I know I did. I’m still scared but being here with you, laughing and enjoying life, I realized that wasting another second without being with you is a stupid move. I want this. I want us to be together and take a chance. Will you take that chance with me?” I look at Elise with soft eyes.

“Of course I will.” A smile forms on my face and I lean in to kiss her again.

Elise’s hands move from mine to my waist. She pulls me in closer as we start walking backward until she runs into the counter. Not once do we come up for air. I put one hand on the edge of the counter and keep the other one on Elise’s waist. Just as things get steamy we hear a knock on the door.

“Oh great.” I pull away and roll my eyes.

“You know one day we’re going to make out without being interrupted by anyone or anything.” Elise slides her hand down my arm and walks over to the door.


	16. Chapter 13: Sharon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1-nmGI2CEzXBT6VJgbKvnJ3fFrbuh5M2K9InDgonW0HY/edit?usp=sharing (Link to studio apartment sketch)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey everyone! Okay, so I know this is a very late update and I apologize for that. This week has been kinda rough for me and honestly just didn't have the energy to write but I got around to it! This is kinda random but for those of you who like to visualize things as you read I attached a rough (very rough) sketch of what the apartment looks like. I realized I originally called it a studio apartment and it technically still is until I also realized I added a second floor and bedrooms to it... so let's just pretend those exist and move on. I would go back and change that but I'm kinda too lazy to so just keep in mind that they live in a made up 2 story studio apartment. This AN is getting kinda long but I've got a few more things to say which will be at the bottom so make sure you stick around for that. I hope you enjoy this chapter!
> 
> \- B

**POV Natasha**

I wake up and roll over to check the time. It’s 9am. I put the phone down and roll back facing the ceiling.

“Breakfast is ready!” I hear Elise yell up the stairs.

Remembering the events of yesterday I lay there for a second smiling.

“You coming down?” Jacob peaks his head into my room.

“Yeah, right behind you.” I get up.

I put on my glasses, grab my robe and head downstairs.

“Hmmm, smells good babe.” I walk up behind Elise and snake my arms around her small waist.

“Babe?” Elise turns her head trying to look at me with raised eyebrows.

I just hum in response as I lean into her neck.

I look up to see Jacob sipping his coffee with a wide grin on his face.

“What are you smiling about goof face?” Elise says something first.

“Oh, nothing. Just seems like me leaving for the night paid off.” Jacob’s grin turns into a smirk.

“Oh shut up.” Elise throws a kitchen towel at him, which he easily dodges.

I can’t help but laugh at the two.

“Hahaha well, Jacob thank you. Definitely paid off.” My chin is still resting on Elise’s shoulder.

“Well, I think it’s time to eat now. I’m starving.” I reach around Elise to grab a piece of bacon but Elise slaps away my hand before I can.

“Patient much? _Babe_.” I smile at the emphasis on babe.

I grab a plate and walk over to the table and sit down.

“So where’d you go last night?” Elise asks Jacob as she pours some syrup on her pancakes.

“Annie and I went bowling.” Jacob was now working on his pancakes too.

“Just you and Annie?” I asked with my eyebrows raised.

“Um, yeah. Just us.” Jacob clears his throat before he takes his first bite.

“So you went on a date.” Elise playfully teases him.

“No, we’re just friends.” Jacob is now starting to look uncomfortable.

“Sure, a friend you want to date.” I decide to jump in on the teasing.

“Um, so what’d you guys do last night?” Jacob is clearly feeling the heat of these teases.

“Netflix and a ton of making out. More details about your night though!” Elise quickly responds and gets back to the previous topic, which makes me laugh.

“At least some of us got laid last night,” Jacob grumbles as he takes another bite.

“See! A friend you want to date. Well, hook up with more like it I guess. And no, we didn’t do anything other than make out last night.” I respond this time.

“Huh. Okay. Well fine, I like Annie. There I said it. Happy?” I haven’t seen Jacob this flustered since he asked me out on our first date years ago.

“Yes, very happy,” Elise replies with a big smile and continues to eat.

“So, is this a mutual feeling?”

“Annie? I don’t know. We’ve hung out, just the two of us, a few times but nothing really has come up. I think we’re just really good friends that’s all. She’s been there for me after you know everything happened. I guess you could call her my ‘Elise’.” Jacob shrugs and takes a sip of coffee.

At his remark, Elise smiles.

“I mean look what happened with Elise and I. So there’s hope for you and Annie.” I shrug back in response.

Elise smiles again and gives me a quick kiss on the cheek.

“Maybe. I dunno. Can we just talk about something else? Or just eat in silence?” I can tell Jacob isn’t really up to talking about this anymore.

The rest of breakfast goes by quietly with a little chitchat here and there.

Jacob thanks Elise for breakfast and heads upstairs to get ready to go out.

Since Elise made breakfast I volunteer to do the dishes. Elise sits on the other side of the counter just watching me.

“You know, I wouldn’t mind living like this every single day.” I look up to see Elise leaning into her hands.

“I mean we have been living like this for the past 3 years now.” I laugh lightheartedly at the view.

“Okay, I mean we’ve lived together for 3 years now but never as girlfriends you know?”

“Oh, so this is official now?” I raise my eyebrows.

“I mean that is if you want to be my girlfriend…” I can tell Elise is starting to get hesitant.

“Relax Elise, of course, I want to be your girlfriend.” Elise is beaming now.

“You know, we’ve out lesbianed the lesbian relationship stereotypes.”

“Oh is that so? And how would that be?”

“We didn’t even wait till the second date to bring in the U-Haul!” Elise now has gotten herself into a small laughing fit.

“Hahaha, I guess so.” I put the last dish on the rack, dry hands and walk over to Elise.

“I’m a bit worried about Jacob.” After finally calming down from her laughing fit Elise’s face turns worried.

“So am I. He didn’t seem very comfortable talking about Annie or I guess more about himself I’ll talk to him later.” I reassure her as I grab both her hands.

“Okay. So what are we doing today?” Elise looks up at me with an adorable expression on her face.

“Well… I was thinking of taking you out on a proper first date.” I cock my head sideways.

“Really?!” Elise suddenly gets super excited.

“Really.” I lean in to give her a kiss.

“Hey, Natasha someone’s calling you.” Jacob comes down the stairs with my phone.

“Dude, you gotta stop doing that.” Elise looks over to Jacob in a slightly irritable voice.

“Doing what?” Jacob seems genuinely confused.

“Interrupting me kissing Elise.” I laugh as I grab my phone.

“Oh. Sorry!” Jacob just scratches his head and heads back upstairs.

I check my phone to see who’s calling and it’s a number I don’t recognize.

“Hello?”

_“Hi is this Natasha? It’s Sharon, Sharon Belle.”_

“Um, Sharon hi.” I look over to Elise who gives me a concerned look.

_“Hey! Hopefully, this isn’t too awkward. I usually have an agent deliver my messages but I thought since we know each other I’d deliver the good news myself. Congrats you’ve been cast for the role you auditioned for!”_

“Oh my god that’s great! Um yeah, I wasn’t expecting a call from you or from my agent for that matter since this was 4 months ago but thanks for reaching out.” I’m surprised by the news but also feel a bit weird being on the phone with Sharon with Elise sitting right in front of me.

_“So does this mean you’ll take the role?”_

“Yeah for sure.”

_“Great! Well, we’re having a get to know you dinner with the cast and crew tonight, which is kind of mandatory so hopefully, I’ll see you then. It’s at 6 at the Marriott Bloor Yorkville Hotel. Do you know where that is?”_

“Um no… no, I don’t.” I look over at Elise wearily.

_“Here I can come pick you up then!”_

“Oh. Okay… um, yeah, I guess I’ll see you tonight then.”

_“Looking forward to it! Oh, don’t forget to dress nice!”_

“Okay. Bye Sharon.” I finally hang up the phone.

I put the phone down and look up to see Elise who seems to have a million different questions.

“Uh, so who’s Sharon? And what was that all about?” I think it’s a hint of jealousy I hear in her voice.

“You remember that audition I went to 4 months ago?”

“Yeah.”

“Well Sharon is the director of the movie I was auditioning for and she was just calling to let me know I got the role.”

“That’s great babe! But, you seemed like you knew her.”

“Um yeah, I ran into her a few times before. Wasn’t aware she was a director though.”

“Oh, got it. So what’s happening tonight?”

“Apparently there’s a mandatory dinner happening at this fancy hotel as a get to know you thing for the cast and crew and… Sharon’s coming to pick me up.” I can see the disappointment all over Elise’s face.

“I’m so sorry Elise. If I knew this was happening I would’ve planned our date another day. I’ll totally make it up to you.”

“It’s okay.” Elise is now looking down at her hands.

“Are you sure? I can call her right now and cancel if that’s what you want.”

“No, I mean it. This is a big deal for you and you should go enjoy it. You deserve it.”

“You know you’re the best.” I lean in to give her a quick kiss.

“We also still have all day together.”

“We do.” Elise is looking up at me now.

“We should do something fun!” I try to be enthusiastic but I can tell Elise is feeling a little down.

“Yeah for sure. I’m going to go take a shower.” Elise stands up and starts walking away.

I sigh and sit down at the counter.

Jacob comes down and takes a look at Elise and then at me.

“What’s up with her?”

“Um, Sharon called.” I look up at Jacob.

“Am I supposed to know who that is?” He takes a seat next to me.

“Redhead.” I sigh.

“Ohhhh the redhead!”

“Shhhh. That’s not why Elise is upset. She doesn’t even know it’s the same person.” Jacob looks confused now.

“You didn’t tell her?” I shake my head no.

“Then why’s she upset?”

“I planned our first date for tonight but now I have to go to this cast and crew dinner at some fancy hotel for a movie I got cast for which of course Sharon is the director of and she’s picking me up…”

“Oh yeah, that’ll definitely upset someone.”

“Not helping. It’s not like I don’t already feel horrible.”

“So are you going to tell her? That Sharon = Redhead?” Jacob raises his eyebrows.

“I will eventually. I didn’t think I would have to. But of course, with my luck, this just happens. I just don’t want to upset Elise. She’s been super supportive of everything but she didn’t particularly like the redhead.”

“I remember.” Jacob nods.

“I’ll tell her soon. But for now, I just want to focus on making this a fun day for her.”

“Okay.” Jacob starts to get up.

“Wait. I was actually meaning to ask you about earlier.” Jacob turns back around to look at me.

“What’d you mean?”

“You clearly like Annie but you didn’t seem comfortable talking about it. What’s up?”

“It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it.” Jacob shakes his head.

“Jacob, I’ve been married to you and had a kid with you. I can tell when something’s bothering you.” I pat the stool Jacob was sitting on.

He hesitantly sits back down.

“Okay… well, I really like Annie.”

“So you really like her. What’s the problem with that?” I’m a bit confused.

“The problem’s not with her it’s me.”

“Care to explain?” Jacob is now shaking his leg. A habit he’s always had and clearly hasn’t lost.

“I really like her and I don’t want to hurt her like I hurt you.” He blurts out.

“Oh, Jacob. What happened between you and me was different. Things were already falling apart and I was pushing you away. You can’t take all the blame for that.” I put my hand on his knee.

“I know. I’m just scared that I won’t be able to man up like I did before if things get hard and I just end up hurting her.”

“Jacob, you’re a good man. You and I both made some bad mistakes but that’s all in the past now. You’ve beaten yourself up for this for far too long. You deserve to be happy and you should give yourself a chance.”

“You think?”

“Yes, I think. You should call her up and ask her out on a date.”

“Okay, I will.” He gives me a tight smile.

“Okay, well I should probably head upstairs and get ready too.” I pat Jacob’s knee and get up.

I start walking towards the stairs.

“It’s really nice to see you happy again Nat.” I turn around to look at Jacob.

“Thanks. I hope to see you happy soon too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I hope y'all enjoyed this chapter! So I'm finally finished with school and hypothetically should have more time but it doesn't always seems like it. I also mentioned that I've had a rough week and if I'm being honest it might be a rough few months for me. Some stuff has been happening in my life that I can't really disclose but bare with me as I try to keep uploading. This book has almost reached its halfway point and I just wanted to thank you all for the love and support. I've got great things in store for chapters to come so if you hang tight I promise not to disappoint!
> 
> \- B


	17. Chapter 14: Jealousy Is A Bitch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey everyone! I know I know it feels like it's been forever since my last update but I'm here now. I was planning on writing this weekend but I got sick and didn't get much of anything done. Hope you enjoy!
> 
> \- B

**POV Elise**

It’s been forever since Natasha has landed a major acting gig and I know I should be happy for her, which I am, but I can’t help but feel a little jealous of this Sharon girl. I know I can trust Natasha and that she wouldn’t do anything to hurt me but back there in the kitchen, I could tell she was trying to hide something. If it’s important she would tell me, right?

I turn off the water and step out of the shower.

Trying not to think about this I look in the mirror and smile to get myself excited about the day I do have with Natasha.

I head to my room and pull out some clothes to wear. Since we’re planning on having a chill day I decide to put on some leggings and a tank top and maybe a flannel around my waist.

As I pull up my leggings I hear a knock.

“Come in!” I yell towards the door as I continue to dress in the closet.

“Elise?” Natasha walks over to the closet door but stops when she sees me.

She’s looking at me with a smirk and I look down to realize I haven’t put on a top yet.

“Not even a first date and I get to see you topless?” Natasha slowly walks towards me.

I grab a piece of clothing off the shelf and throw it at her.

“Haha funny. As if you haven’t seen me topless before.” Natasha is laughing now.

“True. But seeing you topless in the dressing room as your best friend and seeing you topless in your closet as your girlfriend has two very different implications.” At this point, Natasha is standing right in front of me.

She leans in for a kiss and my breath hitches as her hands touch my bare waist.

We stand there just making out for a couple of minutes until I pull away.

“I should probably put this on.” I smile as I lift up my tank top.

“Awww do you have to?” Natasha takes a small step back and pouts.

“I mean I could just leave topless.” I raise my eyebrows.

“Mhmm, you could. But then I would get jealous when all the guys and gals stare at your perfect body so you better put that tank top on.” I blush at the compliment and put on the top.

“Okay, I’m ready to leave now.” Natasha nods and grabs my hand.

She leads me out of my closest.

With all the making out and compliments I didn’t get a chance to admire Natasha’s outfit.

As always she looks stunning. She’s wearing light washed blue skinny jeans with a black v neck and white converse. I don’t know how I got so lucky and landed this hottie.

Today is a pretty warm day which I’m glad because it’ll make being outdoors all the better.

Natasha grabs her keys and we head out.

She was holding my hand the whole time and only let go to open the car door for me which I found adorable.

“So where should we go?” Natasha starts the engine and looks over at me.

“The park!” I respond with excitement.

“Hahaha, the park it is.” Natasha just shakes her head and start driving.

The drive to the park isn’t long.

After finding a parking spot we start walking towards the actual park.

“This is nice.” Natasha smiles and intertwines her hand in mine.

“Yeah, it is.” I look over and smile.

We spend about 20 minutes walking and every single time we passed a dog Natasha would get super excited which made me laugh every single time.

We spotted an ice cream stand so we stopped to get some ice cream.

We walk over to an empty spot on the field and sit down.

“You like the ice cream?” Natasha smirks at me as I eat with a big smile on my face.

“Mhmm!”

I finish my ice cream first and scooch closer to Natasha.

“Oh, so now that you’re done with your ice cream you come over here to eat mine?” She looks over with a smile.

“No! I just really like you!” I get defensive.

“Glad to hear that cupcake. I really like you too.”

I sit up to give her a kiss but right before I can she pulls away and licks her ice cream instead.

“Hey!” I slap her on her arm.

She gives me quick peck on the lips which I wasn’t prepared for.

“Better?” Natasha finishes the last of her ice cream.

“No.” I just cross my arms.

She leans in to kiss me again but little longer this time.

“How ‘bout now?” She’s raising an eyebrow now.

“Hmmm not quite.”

Before I know it I’m pinned to the ground with Natasha on top kissing me.

I smile into the kiss but don’t break it.

I quickly flip Natasha over so I’m on top still not breaking the kiss.

Things quickly get heated and Natasha pulls away.

“As much fun as that was I think we should slow down a bit.” She props herself up on her elbows as I still straddle her.

“You’re right sorry.” I scoot back a bit to allow her to sit up fully.

“Hey, it’s okay. I’m just saying if things are going to get heated a public park may not be the ideal place.” Natasha reaches over for my hands.

“Haha yeah, I think we’ve already got some people who were staring.”

Natasha lays back down and puts her right arm out.

I roll off of her and lay down on her arm.

**POV Natasha**

“That one looks like a dog.” I point to a cloud with my free hand.

“Hahaha, you and dogs. I’m surprised you don’t own one yet.” I can feel Elise’s body vibrate with laughter next to me.

“You know, I was considering getting one. Twice. First when Jacob and I first got married but then we had Andrew and I didn’t have time for a dog. The second time was after you moved in but I got too busy with work to get a chance to visit a pound.” I run my hand up and down Elise’s toned arm.

“Well, before you get too busy with work again we should get you a dog.”

“Really?” I turn my head towards Elise.

“Really.” She gives me a quick peck on the lips and looks back up at the clouds.

We spend the rest of the morning walking around the park.

After grabbing a late lunch we head back home so I can get ready for tonight.

Once we get back somehow we found ourselves making out again on the couch. I guess this is what people mean about the “honeymoon phase”. No complaints here.

I look up to see the time and see that it’s already 4.

“I should really start getting ready now.” I start to get up slowly.

“Getting pretty for another lady.” Elise looks up with a pout on her face.

“I only get pretty for my lady. Don’t worry.” A smile forms on her face.

“I’m going to take a shower but you can help me pick out something to wear afterward.” Elise nods in response and I head upstairs.

I know I should tell her about Sharon but I don’t know how. “Oh hey by the way the director of my new movie is also the redhead I was hooking up with that you hated”. Yeah, no, that’s not going to work out. Things are good between the two of us right now and I don’t want to ruin it with something that shouldn’t matter. I’ll tell her when the time is right.

I finish my shower and head to my room to find Elise sitting on my bed waiting for me.

“What a pretty surprise.” I walk over to my bed.

“Mhmm. I got bored downstairs so I thought I’d get a head start on looking through your closet.” I can’t help but laugh.

I look over to see that she’s laid out 3 different outfit options on my bed.

“Let me get some clothes on and I’ll be back.”

“I’ll be waiting.” Elise just sits there and gives me an adorable smile.

I quickly put on some undergarments and walk back out drying my hair.

“You give me a hard time about being topless and here you walk out with barely anything on?” Elise raises her eyebrows.

“What? I’m not going to put real clothes on when I’m going to have to change out of them anyways and it’s not like it’s anything you haven’t seen before.” I smirk.

“True true.” Elise nods.

“Okay well, here are some things I pulled from your closet. Mostly my personal favorites.” She gives me a shy smile.

I look down to see my options.

The first is a pair of black leather pants, white t-shirt, leather jacket, and a black pair of boots. A classic simple look that’s also my favorite.

The second is a simple black tank top dress with a silver jacket and white Toms to go with it. A bit “prettier” than I usually dress but still a good outfit.

The third is a white button up, black blazer, black pants, and a fedora and black heals to go with it. Definitely a staple look.

“Gotta give it to you Elise, you may wear the same thing all the time but you’ve got a good eye for clothing.”

“Hey! But thanks.” I earn shove and a smile from her.

“I think I’ll go with outfit one.” I reach down for the pants.

“Yayy! I was hoping you would. It’s my favorite.”

I give Elise a small smile and start putting the clothes on.

I assumed Elise would wait downstairs after I picked out an outfit but she just sat there watching me get ready. I didn’t mind the company. I actually enjoyed spending this extra time with her.

After I put the finishing touches on my make up I turn towards Elise.

“Wow.” She starts walking towards me.

“That hot huh?” I smirk.

“Way to ruin the moment babe.” Elise laughs and rolls her eyes.

“But you do look smoking. Wish I was the one taking you out tonight.” She snakes her arm around my waist.

“I know me too. I promise I’ll do something great to make it up to you.” I lean down and give her kiss.

We hear the doorbell ring.

“That must be Sharon.” I grab my clutch and head downstairs.

Elise trails closely behind.

I open the door to see Sharon in a tight red dress.

“Hey, Natasha! You look amazing!” I blush and hear Elise walk up behind me.

“Hey Sharon, I could say the same about you.”

Sharon looks past me to see Elise.

“Hi I’m Sharon Belle, I don’t think we’ve met.” She reaches out a hand.

“Hi, I’m Elise Bauman, Natasha’s girlfriend.” Elise gives a forced smile.

“Girlfriend? You didn’t tell me you had a girlfriend Natasha?”

“Oh, well it’s kinda new but yes, she’s my girlfriend and the best one too.” I smile and look towards Elise.

“Lucky you. Well, we should probably get going. It was nice meeting you, Elise.”

“You too.” I can tell Elise is bothered a bit.

“I’ll see you later babe.” I give Elise a kiss and head out.

**POV Elise**

Wait. Sharon is a redhead.


	18. Chapter 15: Redhead

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Woah! Surprise! Hey everyone! I know it hasn't been a week yet but I had some time on my hands so I thought I'd write. Now, since I posted an extra update I can't promise a new update at the usual time. But hopefully this makes up for my lack of consistency the past few weeks! Enjoy the chapter!
> 
> \- B

**POV Natasha**

Sharon and I pull up at the hotel and even just the outside of it looks grand. I’ve lived here my whole life and I don’t know how I missed this. This place being fancy and all Sharon’s car gets valeted. When we walk up to the front of the hotel Sharon grabs my hand and leads me inside. Just a month ago this gesture wouldn’t have bothered me but somehow now it does. I know it’s a harmless gesture but just the thought of being around Sharon while Elise is waiting for me at home by herself is making me uncomfortable. I’m starting to feel guilty about this whole thing and it must be showing on my face.

“Hey, Natasha are you okay?” Sharon stands to face me.

“No, yeah I’m fine. Just had a long day. We should probably join the rest of them.” I gently slide my hand out of Sharon’s to point to the dining area.

“Yeah, of course.” Sharon seems to get the hint and starts to walk in front of me.

Other than the fact that I’m a terrible girlfriend bothering me I’m having a pretty good time. I got to meet all the cast and crew who were all great but now it’s getting late and I’m starting to miss home. I know it’s only 10:30 but I feel this urge to get home.

“Hey,” I walk over to Sharon.

“Hey, what’s up?”

“I think I’m going to head home.”

“Leaving so early? Do you need me to give you a ride back?” There’s a look of concern on her face.

“No no, it’s okay. I’ll just call an Uber.”

“Okay, well I’m so glad you came out tonight! I’ll reach out later this week.”

“Thanks, I had a good time.” That’s a half lie.

Sharon leans in to give me a hug which I’m hesitant to accept but I eventually give. I say goodbye and head to the hotel lobby. I call for an Uber and wait.

**POV Elise**

**After Natasha leaves for the party**

I’m just being paranoid right? It’s just a coincidence that Natasha hooked up with a redhead and then auditioned for a movie that she somehow knows the director who also just happens to be a redhead. I don’t want to be the over jealous girlfriend but if Sharon is the same person why hasn’t she told me? I guess she isn’t obligated to tell given we weren’t dating then. But why is she acting like she’s hiding something? Ugh. I try to distract myself by watching tv but when that doesn’t work I call up Jacob.

“Hey, Elise.” Jacob picks up almost immediately.

“Hey, are you busy?” I must be feeling desperate if I’m calling Jacob.

“Kinda, but what’s up?”

“Oh, nevermind then.” What was I thinking calling him up?

“Hey, are you okay?” I can hear the concern in Jacob’s voice.

“Honestly not really. But don’t ditch whatever you’re doing. I’m fine.” I try to cover up my voice.

“Nah it’s okay I was about to leave anyway. I’ll be home in 10.”

“You’re the best. See you then.” I hang up and toss my phone on the other couch.

I just lay there waiting trying not to think. Not very successful at either.

I hear the door unlock and get up.

“Hey, I brought Chinese.” I run over to Jacob.

“Kinda figured you haven’t eaten and I was already there so I thought I’d pick up some for you.” Jacob puts the takeout box down and hangs his coat.

“Thanks, you’re amazing.” I head over to the kitchen to grab a fork.

“So what’s up?” Jacob sits down at the counter.

“I don’t know. I think I’m just making a big deal out of nothing but I’m going crazy right now.” I grab the box of food and start eating.

“Is it about Natasha?” I nod with a bunch of food in my mouth.

“Where is she by the way?”

“At a party. With another girl.”

“Oh yeah, I forgot about the party but what do you mean by another girl?”

“That’s what I’m going crazy about. She was a redhead.” I raise my eyebrows.

“And…?” Jacob sounds hesitant.

“And she knew her.” I’m started to get frustrated.

“So? What’s the problem with that?” He sounds on edge.

“What are you hiding?” I narrow my eyes at him.

“What? Why would I be hiding something?” He’s getting defensive now.

“Because you’re hesitant to answer and seem on edge. You know something. She would’ve told you. She tells you everything doesn’t she?”

“Elise, relax. If there’s a problem you should talk to her about it. It’s not my place to say anything.”

“Ha! You do know something. Why won’t you just tell me? Is it something bad? Ugh, Jacob, you’re not helping.” I run a hand through my hair.

“I’m sorry. Is there anything I can do to help?” Jacob’s eyes soften.

“Tell me what she told you,” I say in an annoyed voice.

“Okay, other than that.” He rolls his eyes.

“Ugh fine. Let’s go get some froyo.” I need to get out and get my mind off of things.

“Okay.” Jacob gets up and gets his keys.

We get our froyo and get back home around 8. We watch a movie and then Jacob heads upstairs to get ready for bed. I just sit on the couch waiting for Natasha to get home.

**POV Natasha**

The whole ride to the house I’m feeling anxious. I know Elise noticed something when I was leaving or at least wasn’t very happy so I don’t know what I’m coming home to. Elise has never been someone to get violently mad but she gets wordy. If she isn’t happy she’ll have something to say about it.

The Uber pulls into our driveway. I thank and pay the driver and walk towards the front door. I check my phone and it’s already 11. The lights are still on so Elise is either waiting in the living room or Jacob is watching Netflix. Really hoping for the latter.

I stop in front of the door and take a deep breath. I open the door and see Elise sitting on the couch.

She doesn’t seem mad but certainly not happy either.

“Hey babe, I’m home.” I walk over to the couch.

I sit down next to Elise and she turns to face me.

“Is everything okay?” I put a hand on her thigh.

“How do you know Sharon?” Elise blurts out.

I’m taken back by her sudden question but I saw it coming.

“Um… we used to have a thing.” I keep my eyes on Elise.

“So it’s the same redhead that I wasn’t happy about like a month ago?”

“Yes.” I can see the disappointment in her eyes.

“I’m sorry babe. I should have told you but I didn’t want to stir up anything in case I didn’t even get the part and it was so long ago I forgot about it.” I rub my hand up and down her leg to reassure her.

“I know it’s none of my business but what was your ‘thing’ with her?” Elise finally looks at me.

“It was nothing really. No commitment. Nothing. We met at the bar and hooked up a few times but that’s it. When I realized that you weren’t happy about it I ended things immediately. I didn’t tell her why but just that it wasn’t a good time for me. I figured it was none of her business.”

“You just hooked up.” Elise seems like she’s processing.

Suddenly she pulls away slightly.

I notice she’s not comfortable so I try to give her space.

“Hey, this was all before we started dating. It means nothing now and Sharon knows not to make a move.” I try to continue to reassure her.

“Natasha you basically lied to me. Now I have to think about the fact you’re going to work for someone who’s basically seen you naked when I, your girlfriend, hasn’t even yet!” I’m taken back by her burst of anger.

“I’m sorry Elise. If I knew it would make you this uncomfortable I would've reconsidered.” I’m starting to sound desperate.

“But you didn’t even ask me. You knew I didn’t like that you were sleeping around but then you decide to work for one of the people you’ve hooked up with SEVERAL times.” She’s definitely getting mad now.

“I know I know and I’m really sorry. This is on me but this is my career, Elise. I haven’t had a gig this big since Andrew died and this was a chance I couldn’t pass up. I’m really sorry I hurt you. I didn’t mean to.” Elise’s expression softens a bit.

She doesn’t respond. Instead, she gets up and heads upstairs.

“Elise,” I try to get her to stay but she just keeps walking.

I decide it’s best to just give her space but now my night is basically ruined.

I fall back into the couch and close my eyes.

I must’ve fallen asleep because I wake up to Jacob shaking me.

I squint at my phone to realize it’s 1 in the morning.

“Hey, you probably want to change and sleep in your bed.” Jacob is leaning over me.

I rub my eyes which by the way was a bad idea because now I have mascara all over my hand.

“Yeah, I probably should. What are you doing up so late?” I sit up.

“I was just getting a drink of water but I saw you passed out on the couch so I thought I'd wake you up.”

“Oh. Well, thanks.” I get up and start heading upstairs.

“Hey, things will work out between you and Elise. Just give her some space.” I turn around to face Jacob.

“You think?”

“Yeah. She can be stubborn but she really likes you. There’s no way she’s letting this get in the way.” This reassures me.

“I mean if we’re okay with everything we’ve gone through then you and Elise will be fine.”

“Thanks, Jacob. You really are the best.” I head upstairs.

I change out of my clothes and take my make up off and crawl under my sheets.

I should call Sharon tomorrow to see if we can work something out. The last thing I want is losing another good thing in my life due to work. I can always find another gig but there’s only one Elise.

I quickly fall asleep with a lot still on my m


	19. Chapter 16: What Am I Feeling?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Woah! It's been a hot sec! Hey everyone! Okay, before all of you start yelling at me I'm sorry for the super late update. I know I said I would update more consistently and well that's definitely not been the case. I finally was able to sit down and finish this chapter so hopefully this one makes up for it. Also, stick around for some other news later! Hope you enjoy this chapter!
> 
> \- B

**2 days later**

**POV Natasha**

It’s been 2 days since our fight. Well, I can’t really call it a fight when Elise just walked away before we could even talk it out. I don’t blame her for her anger because I should’ve told her but I wish she would understand a bit more. The day after our argument she was talking to me again but something was different. Every kiss was short and every physical interaction was hesitant. I know I fucked it up.

I called Sharon immediately and tried to make an arrangement that would work. I knew I was risking losing my job by bringing my personal life into my professional one but it was worth it if I meant it would make Elise feel better. I tried to keep out the details because I doubt Elise wants me telling my ex-fling/director that she’s jealous or something. Sharon said that she would see what she could do and would call back.

So, I’ve been waiting.

My life was going great and I somehow managed to mess up everything. I had the girl of my dreams and an amazing job opportunity. I was finally getting better and getting the help I need but I screwed that all up.

Today I’ve got another session of therapy and usually Elise goes with me but after the events of late, I decide not to bother her.

“Hey, I’m heading out.” I grab my keys and head towards the door.

“Okay. Have a good session.” It’s not the voice I was hoping to hear.

“Thanks, Jacob.” I turn around and smile.

“Um, where’s Elise?”

“She left to meet Annie this morning. She didn’t tell you?” Jacob puts his hands in his pockets.

“Oh, no.” I try to mask the disappointment in my voice but fail.

“Hey, it’s going to be okay. I know this must feel like shit for you right now but it’s going to be okay. She’ll come around.” Jacob steps closer to me.

“Thanks.” I give a faint smile.

Jacob leans in to me give a hug and I head out.

I pull up into the parking lot of the office. I just sit in the car trying to will myself to get out. I haven’t been to therapy on my own since I first went. Elise was always here holding my hand but today I’m by myself. I finally get out and head inside.

I walk up to my shrink’s office and knock.

“Hi Natasha, come in.” Dr. Adams opens the door and welcomes me in.

“Hi.” I walk and take a seat on the usual couch.

“How are you today?” Dr. Adams grabs her pad of paper and pen and sits down across from me.

“If I’m being honest, not that great.” Dr. Adams just nods and encourages me to continue.

“Things between Elise and I aren’t good right now.” Dr. Adams looks up me.

“Do you want to tell me why?” I slowly nod my head.

“So, a few months ago, this was before I started seeing you, I kinda let loose. I spent a lot of time at bars and I met someone at one bar I went to. We hooked up a few times and it didn’t mean anything. When Elise found out about her she wasn’t particularly happy.”

“But you guys weren’t dating yet though correct?” Dr. Adams asks.

“Yeah, this was before anything happened between us. Anyways, when I realized how mad she was about it I ended things right away because the last thing I wanted was to hurt Elise with my reckless behavior. After a couple of weeks that happened, I had an audition for the first time in awhile and turns out the director was the same person I hooked up with. I know, I’ve got quite the luck. Anyways, I didn’t know how to tell Elise so I didn’t tell her at all. This audition was months ago so honestly at this point I’d forgotten about it.” I pause to see the reaction of my shrink and there’s nothing but an understanding expression on her face.

“It gets worse.” I let out a big sigh.

“We were supposed to have our first official date the other day and well I got a call from Sharon, the director, telling me that I had gotten the part and that I had to attend the mandatory cast and crew dinner that night. At this point, I felt terrible about not telling Elise and about having to reschedule the date. I was planning on telling her but I just didn’t know how. Sharon came to pick me up later that night and Elise saw her and made some connections. Before all of this, we all just referred to her as the “redhead”. So, I meant it when I said it was nothing serious. When I got home Elise told me how upset she was, which she had the right to be, but she just stormed upstairs and we haven’t talked about it ever since.” I finally take a deep breath and sit back.

“That’s a lot Natasha, but I’m glad you shared with me.” Dr. Adams puts her pen down and looks up at me.

“I noticed that the whole time you were telling me what was wrong you sounded regretful. It’s important to know your own fault but you can’t only blame yourself.” I frown at what she has to say.

Dr. Adams must pick up on my annoyance because she continues to explain herself.

“It’s clear that you care about Elise but you can’t beat yourself up for all the decisions you made. I'm not saying you should blame her for being mad but you also have the right to explain yourself. Too much guilt isn’t healthy for a person.” I understand what she means.

I remember when I came in here with Jacob we went through a similar process. Jacob had all this pent-up guilt and it was hurting him. I had no idea what he was feeling because he never told me. He blamed himself for everything when I played my part too.

“So you think I should tell her how I feel too?” Dr. Adams nods, encouraging me to continue.

“I did feel a little disappointed when Elise didn’t give me a chance to explain. She kind of brushed off the point that this is my career. I should’ve told her but this was an opportunity I couldn’t give up. I hadn’t acted in awhile and I really needed to get back into things.”

I’m now thinking whether or not calling Sharon was the right call. What if I lose my job? What if I get a bad rep for not being professional?

“Natasha?” Dr. Adams gets my attention.

I take a deep breath.

“Communication is key Natasha. You’re a person that feels a lot but you have a tendency of keeping all of it in. Do you remember how you and Jacob were able to resolve things between you two just by communicating better?” I nod.

“The same applies to you and Elise. This is all new to you. You haven’t been in an official relationship since your divorce and it’s going to be scary at times but it’s not a bad thing to put your needs first at times. Talk to Elise and tell her how this situation makes you feel. She may still be hostile afterward but if you don’t try then you haven’t exhausted all your possibilities yet.” I soak in everything she’s just said.

“Thank you.” I look down at my feet for a second.

“Of course. You’ve made a lot of progress Natasha but we’ve all got things we could improve on and right now for you it's expressing your feelings.”

Afterwards Dr. Adams and I talk about other light matters and I head out.

I’m driving home and I hear my phone ring in the passenger seat.

It’s Sharon.

I pick up and put her on speaker.

_“Hello?”_ Sharon breaks the silence.

“Hi.” I take a deep breath.

“How are you?”

_“I’m doing well. Thanks for asking. Are you okay?”_ I can hear the concern in her voice.

“Yeah yeah I’m good. Look, I just wanted to apologize for the other day. It was really unprofessional of me to ask you that favor. I should’ve kept my personal life out of my professional one. I totally understand if you no longer want me to work on the movie.” I quickly apologize.

_“Oh no! What are you talking about Natasha? You have nothing to apologize for. I get it. When I found out that you got the role I realized there could be possible awkwardness and I wanted to do anything to make it comfortable for you.”_ My shoulders must have been tense because they suddenly relax.

“You really are the best Sharon. I must have put you in a compromised position asking you to minimize interaction between us.”

_“I understand. I’m assuming Elise doesn’t really like me very much? Although, I technically never did anything to her myself. I would, however, like to meet her and clear the air with her.”_ That sounded like a terrible idea.

As much as I would love for Elise and Sharon to get along, I think trying to get Elise to get on the same page as Sharon would only make things worse.

“I really appreciate that Sharon, but I think right now it’s best for me to figure things out myself.”

_“Of course, I totally understand. Well, I emailed you a compromise so let me know how that works for you and we can go from there.”_ I pull into my driveway.

“Thank you so much, Sharon. You really are the best. I owe you one.”

_“You sure do. Maybe after things settle down for you and Elise we can grab a coffee or something. We never really got to know each other.”_ I smile.

“I’d like that. I got to go but I’ll see you on set Sharon.”

“ _Bye Natasha.”_ I hang up.

**POV Elise**

I just got home from hanging out with Annie. Do I feel a little bad that I skipped taking Natasha to therapy? Hell yeah but I’m also still mad about the whole Sharon thing. I know I’ve been hostile to Natasha for the past couple of days and I’m finally ready to talk to her.

I look out the window to see Natasha finally pulling into the driveway.

I wait for her to come in but she’s sitting in the car. It looks like she’s talking to someone.

She’s smiling. I feel a twinge of pain in my heart.

I haven’t seen her genuinely smile since the morning of our argument and to think someone else is the reason why she’s smiling kind of hurts.

She’s finally heading towards the door so I stand up and walk over.

“Hey.” I stuff my hands in my back pocket.

“Oh hey. I didn’t know you were home.” Natasha sounds tired which causes me to frown a bit.

“Um, so how was your session?” I’m hesitant but I walk over closer to her.

“It was good.” Natasha puts her things away and brushes past me.

Just when I thought she was about to just leave me hanging there she turns around to face me.

“I’m sorry. Dammit, Dr. Adams said to stop apologizing, but I’m sorry.” I can see the pain in her eyes.

“I never meant to hurt you, Elise. I love you.” I was about to say something but I’m taken back by that statement.

She just stares at me waiting for me to say something.

I try to gather my thoughts but I don’t know what to say.

I know I love her too. I should say it but I can’t.

“Natasha…” That’s all I manage to get out.

“I know. I know this is abrupt and it’s not fair of me to just say that but my shrink said that I needed to do a better job of expressing my feelings so I am. I love you and I mean it. To prove it I called Sharon and I made sure I could minimize my interaction with her on set hoping it would put your mind at ease.” Natasha no longer seems exhausted but rather determined.

I walk up closer to Natasha.

I put my hands on her waist and lean my forehead onto hers.

“I love you too.” I breathe out.

I see a single tear roll down Natasha’s face.

I reach up to wipe it away.

“I’m sorry too. I was caught up in my own hurt I wasn’t supportive. I wasn’t thinking about how this was an amazing opportunity for you and how you wouldn’t do anything to hurt me. You wouldn’t have taken this job if you thought I wouldn’t be comfortable with it.” I pull back to see her face better.

“Of course! Elise, you’re the world to me. I wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize this.”

“I know, I know. I want you to do what you love Natasha. I don’t want to stand in the way of your career because I couldn’t handle a little jealousy. Do I wish you would’ve told me sooner? Yes, but I should have done a better job of communicating with you. It was wrong of me to just walk away. This relationship is a team effort and I’ve been selfish.”

Natasha is silent.

Without saying a word her lips crashes onto mine.

My hands slide up her neck and get tangled in her hair.

Her hand moves to my lower back and pulls me in closer.

All the anger and hurt I was feeling just disappears. I get lost in the kiss and I’m no longer thinking straight.

Natasha pulls back and leans her forehead back onto mine.

We just stand there in silence as I feel her breath on my lips.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I hope y'all enjoyed this chapter! So, I mentioned that I have some news. So when I started writing More To Us I never intended to do any other writing outside of this but I've been inspired so I've start working on another work. It's one of the reasons why I was so delayed on this update because I was working on that one. For all my Supergirl fans out there it is a Supergirl story so hope that gets you hyped :). The layout of it is slightly different than this one first of all unlike this one I'm not planning on updating as I write and secondly it's more a third person narrative than dialogue/first person heavy based. I'm currently writing it all out in chunks and then I'll upload it. I know that's not much but it's something I'm excited about so I hope y'all enjoy it when it comes out. I'll keep y'all posted but in the mean time please just keep loving More To Us :).
> 
> \- B


	20. Chapter 17: You Are Not Your Mistakes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey everyone! So once again I'm terrible at updating but this time its was due to major writer's block. Completely blanked out on what to write next and was also working on my Supergirl story that I just couldn't get this chapter done but it's here now! This chapter is kinda a filler chapter so don't hate me for it being shorter and not the best! Enjoy!
> 
> \- B

**POV Jacob**

Life has been good. Or at least I think it has been. The first few weeks after Andrew's death it was rough. I could see that Natasha was falling apart. Every day I woke up and saw her and felt a pang of guilt. The past few years her life wasn't easy and I'm the one to blame. I was absent, I cheated, and I walked away without even a fight. I left her alone with our son and let her to pick up the pieces and then having to watch her giving up and just letting all of that go I couldn't live without myself. Andrew was Natasha's son. Our son. But I had no meaning in his life. I may have been his father but I wasn't his dad.

"Hey, you alright there?" Matt waves his hand in front of my face.

That gets my attention and I snap out of my daze.

"Oh yeah yeah." I shake my head.

Matt, Annie and I are hanging out at Annie's apartment and I must have zoned out and the movie we were watching ended.

"I'm going to grab another beer. Do either of you need one?" I stand.

"Nah, I just got this one." Matt raises his bottle.

"Annie?"

"Could you get me some water?" She looks up to face me.

"Yeah for sure."

I head to the fridge to grab another beer. I then head over to grab a cup of water for Annie.

"Is everything okay?" I look up to see Annie standing on the other side of the counter.

"Yeah, of course. Why wouldn't it be?" I hand her her water and slightly frown.

"Well, you seem kind of out of it today but if you don't want to talk about it then okay." Annie just smiles at me.

That's what she's always done. Just smiled.

When I first met Matt and Annie I was a mess. I had just moved into my place, it was the first day at my new workplace, finalized my divorce, and I was all alone.

Annie never pried. She never asked questions and always just went with things. She gave me a chance to start over.

A few months after I had moved Annie found me overly drunk at a bar. It was my anniversary and well, I was attempting to drown all my feelings and mistakes with alcohol. I had left my phone at home so I wouldn't drunk dial Natasha and I guess Annie was trying to reach me. When she found me she just sat there next to me for a few minutes. To this day I can't remember anything else from that night except that the next morning there was a cup of water and Aspirin on my nightstand and Annie was asleep on my couch. When I started to come to my senses I had racked my brain for all the possible things I could've told her. She woke up and all she said was "good morning" and smiled.

Eventually, she told me that I had essentially bared my soul in a matter of minutes but of course all she did was smile. That woman didn't seem to be phased by a single mistake I've made.

She's stuck by me through all the anniversaries; marriage and divorce, and Andrew's birthday. She was always there with her simple but warm smile.

"Hey, guys I think I'm going to head out. I'm supposed to fly out tomorrow morning for a business trip." I look past Annie to see Matt standing up.

"Oh yeah, your business trip. I completely forgot about that!" Annie turns around to face Matt.

"Mhmm. 7am flight to Florida." Matt walks over and sets down his now empty bottle.

"Well, you two don't have too much fun without me." Matt winks.

"Have fun without you? Impossible." I laugh.

Matt grabs his things and heads for the door.

"Well, I'll see you guys when I come back. We should really hang out with Elise and Natasha again!"

"Haha sure." I smile.

"Have a safe flight!" Annie gives Matt a hug.

Matt leaves and Annie turns back around to face me.

"You leaving too?"

I look at my watch. It's only 7.

"Nah, unless you've got things to do then I can take off too."

"Nope. Tomorrow is Saturday and I've got nothing urgent to take care of so you're free to stay as long as you want."

"Cool." I smile.

I walk over to the couch and plop down. I let out a big sigh.

I close my eyes and lean back.

"I lost a kid."

"You had a kid I didn't know about?" I open an eye to look up to see Annie standing in front of me.

"Sorry, bad joke." I close my eye and sigh again.

"I thought everything was fine." I feel the couch dip next to me.

"Yes, everything is fine. Great. Amazing."

"Jacob," I feel Annie's hand on my arm.

"Elise and Natasha are happy. I'm friends with Elise now, Natasha and I have put our past behind us, Natasha is finally recovering from all the damage I've caused..."

"Jacob," I open my eyes.

"It's not your fault Andrew died." Annie looks concerned.

"I know. It's not my fault Andrew died but it is my fault Natasha was hurt. It was my fault Elise had to step into her life and pick up all my slack. It's my fault that I left my family broken and behind."

"I thought you got through all of this in therapy with Natasha?" I close my eyes again.

"No one tells you how you're supposed to deal with losing a child. I know I wasn't there for half his life but he was still my kid and he's gone. No one ever tells you how to move on from your mistakes. All I've done is put Band-Aids all over the place hoping they'll hold."

Annie doesn't say anything so I continue.

"You know I was an ass? I loved Natasha so much. I mean I still love her but we had something. The moment I met her I fell in love. She hated her family so I became her family. She was alone so I was there for her. I've never loved someone like I loved Natasha." Annie just rubs my arm.

"And there's you." I turn to look at Annie.

She looks taken back by the mention of her.

"You have this smile. It's a great smile. Feeling of home at this point." She smiles.

"You're hardworking but you also know how to give yourself a break and be there for the people you care about." Still smiling she tilts her head to the side.

"I'm so scared I'm going to hurt you, Annie." She now looks confused.

"I've felt something for you for awhile now Annie but I'm terribly afraid I'm going to hurt you so I can't bear to put you in that position." I open my mouth to speak again but Annie stops me before I can.

"Jacob, you're not the confused broken man you were 3 years ago. Also, you're not the only one feeling things." I'm the one taken back now.

"I never made a move because you've always had something going on in your life and I knew you already had a lot to deal with. Then the car accident happened and you were spending time with Natasha again so I didn't want to stand between the two of you. There may have been things stopping us from taking the next step but not one of those reasons is because you're the guy who cheats and walks out. That's not you anymore."

"Annie,"

"No, it's my turn," Annie says sternly.

"I've known you for 3 years and never once in those years have you proven that you were the ass you've made yourself out to be. We all have our pasts but you are not your mistakes. You've done things and there's no one but yourself who's beating you up for it. Natasha forgave you for it so why don't you forgive yourself?"

"Forgive myself?" Annie nods.

"Even if I did who's to say I won't do that to another girl?"

"I say."

Annie takes my hands in hers.

"Jacob, you're a good guy. Great actually. You've been there to pick up the pieces for Elise and Natasha for the past 5 months so now let someone pick up your pieces for you."

"Okay." I sigh


	21. Chapter 18: Daydreaming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey everyone! So, I know this is a long overdue chapter... again... so, I'm sorry for that. To make up for it I made it extra long. I also have some other excited news so make sure you stick around at the end for another AN. For all my Grey's Anatomy fans I put in some Grey's references so see if you can catch them ;). Enjoy!
> 
> \- B

**A week later**

**POV Natasha**

“I’m back!” I hear Elise close the front door behind her.

“Hey babe,” I turn from the couch to see Elise standing behind me.

She leans down to give me a quick kiss and I can’t help but smile into it.

“So, how’d the interview go?”

Elise has spent the last couple of years focusing on her writing and she’s loved every second of it but now she wants to get back into the film industry. With my new role, Elise realized how much she’s missed it all. Like me, Elise graduated from a school of arts but with a degree of directing so, she thought now was her chance to pick that up.

Ironically it was Sharon who helped Elise get an interview with a film company that she used to work for.

“It was great!” Elise puts her keys down and sits on my lap.

“It was a producer that interviewed me and he said they were looking for a fresh perspective. He said he actually saw a few of my works and read some of my pieces and loved the way I expressed myself and wanted that energy to be directing his film.”

“That’s amazing! Elise, I’m so proud of you.” I pull Elise into a tight hug.

“He said that he still has to talk to his team about it but he thinks I’ve got a good shot at getting this job.”

“Well, Elise Bauman you are a talented and smart individual and I do not doubt for a second that would go unnoticed.” Elise smiled widely.

“Thanks, babe. You know I should probably say thank you to Sharon. I was a pain in her ass yet she asked a favor for me and got me this opportunity.” She frowned slightly.

“Hey, don’t beat yourself up for it. She actually felt bad herself for making things complicated and she wanted to make up for it but if it makes you feel better I bet I could fix up a meeting for you two.”

“Really? I guess I didn’t trust her enough when I first met her and that was a misjudgment on my part. I would like that.” Elise looks down at her hands as she always does when she’s anxious or worried.

“I’ll talk to her tomorrow.” I rub my hand on her back.

“So, how was your day?” Elise looks up to face me.

“It was great actually.” I beamed.

“Oh yeah?” Elise cocked her head.

“Yeah! I spent all day planning the perfect first date. I figured it was about time I made up for the one I kinda ruined.”

“Haha that wasn’t your fault but I am intrigued now.” Elise wraps her arms around my shoulder.

“What are we doing?”

“Well, that’s a surprise. Just dress casual and be ready to leave at 5.” I give her a wink.

I slide Elise off of my lap and get up.

Elise looks up at me with a pout.

“That’s no fun. You know how much I don’t like surprises.” I smirk at her.

“Well, it’s very fun for me. You’ll just have to wait and see.” I lean down and give her a kiss.

**POV Elise**

I watch Natasha walk over to the fridge.

“Fine.” I let out a sigh.

“So what are we going to do till then?” Natasha grabs a can of La Croix out of the fridge.

“Well, I’m going to make lunch for the two of us right now. Then, you’re going to spend the next few hours wondering what our first date is going to be while I go run some errands.” Natasha looks up with a big smile like she’s accomplished something.

“You’re a cruel person you know that?” I get up and walk over to the counter.

“Mhmm, but yet you still love me.” She smiles again.

“Apparently I do.” I let out a small laugh and shake my head.

Natasha made us both a sandwich and prepared a plate of fresh fruits and vegetables.

After lunch, she grabbed a bag and headed out to run her errands.

I look at my watch and it’s only 1pm. I still have 4 hours to kill and I have no idea what to do. Jacob went on some sort of vacation with Matt and Annie so calling them isn’t an option.

I decide to do some house cleaning. I realize that with Jacob, Natasha, and I having been so busy trying to get on with our lives and focus on our careers that our house is a mess.

I pick things off the floor and drag out the vacuum from the closet.

I notice a small box that was behind the vacuum and I take it out.

I open the box and it’s Andrew’s baby things that Natasha hid away to get Andrew to outgrow. A sad smile forms on my face as I look through the things. At the bottom of the box, I find an unlabeled envelope, which I take out.

I know I shouldn’t be snooping but at this point, I’m too curious.

There’s a letter inside which I pull out and read.

It’s Natasha’s handwriting.

_“I’m sorry.”_

That’s the first line of the letter and now I have to read on.

_“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I drove you away. You’re gone and I don’t know how to go on by myself. I don’t know what to say but I let you just walk away. I tried to call but I couldn’t bear to hear your voice so I ended up writing a letter instead. This is the 10th draft of the letter and I still can’t get it right but you have the right to know. I let you walk away and feel like an ass when you weren’t the only one who made mistakes.”_

She has yet to address who she’s talking to.

_“Andrew misses you and if I’m being honest I miss you too but when you told me what happened I didn’t know what to say because I essentially threw in the towel first.”_

I’m so confused now. She mentioned Andrew so I’m assuming she’s talking to Jacob but I have no idea what she’s talking about.

I’m starting to realize this is something not meant to be read so I stop reading.

I put the letter back into the envelope but hold onto it.

I continue to clean the house.

I look at my watch again and it’s already 4.

I go upstairs to take a shower and start getting ready.

I get out of the shower and walk into my closet.

She said to dress casual but how casual? I have no idea where we’re going so I don’t know if she means jeans and a t-shirt kind of casual or leggings and tank top kind of casual.

I end up going with a pair of army green skinny jeans rolled up at the ankle, white tank top with a jean flannel, and my white Converse.

I check the time again and it’s 4:55 and Natasha’s not here yet. I’m starting to get worried.

I go downstairs to wait for her.

At exactly 5 I hear a knock on the door.

I open the door to find Natasha standing in front of me with a bouquet of flowers in her hands.

“Hey, these are for you. Tried to pick flowers that matched your beauty but realized it was quite impossible so I got you roses instead.” Natasha has a geeky smile on her face.

“These are beautiful! Thank you, Natasha.” I give her a tight hug.

When I pull away I notice that she’s wearing a different outfit from earlier.

She’s wearing a pair of washed out grey jeans, plain white blouse tucked in at the front and a pair of black boots.

No matter what she wears she looks flawless.

“When you’re done staring you ready to go?” I look up to Natasha smirking.

“Nah I’d rather just stand here staring.” Natasha raises her eyebrows.

“Haha, I’m kidding. We can go right after I put these flowers in some water.”

“Good, because I’m not letting all this planning go to waste.”

I run over to the kitchen and grab a cup and quickly fill it with water. I put the flowers in the cup and walk back out.

“I’ll put it in something better when we come back.”

I grab Natasha’s hand and head out.

“Aren’t you cold?”

It’s not cold outside but there’s a small breeze.

“Nope. But if I do get cold I have a jacket in the car. Don’t worry.” She just looks over and smiles.

Natasha opens the door to the passenger seat and closes it after I get in.

She walks around the car and gets in herself.

“So are you going to tell me where we’re going now?” Natasha puts her own seatbelt on.

“Nope. Just be patient babe.”

“Ugh, okay.”

The car ride isn’t too long. We spend most of it making small talk.

Natasha gets off the main road and starts driving on gravel. Now I’m really curious.

Natasha must notice because she reaches over and grabs my hand.

“Don’t worry, I’m not taking you out to nowhere.” She looks over and smiles.

She finally parks in an empty lot that looks like a dead field.

We get out and Natasha grabs a bag from the trunk.

“This is it?” I try not to sound disappointed but I can’t help it.

“Just wait Elise. Just wait.”

Natasha closes the trunk and grabs my hand walking towards what feels like is nowhere.

After we start walking for a bit I notice a trail appearing. We walk over what appears to be a hill and I notice a beautiful field.

We keep walking and I realize we're at the edge of what seems to be a cliff or something.

My jaw drops when I finally take in everything.

There’s a beautiful table set up for two and with a waiter in a black tux.

I look over to the right and there’s what seems to be a gourmet food truck with a chef inside.

All of this is looking over an amazing view of the city.

I look over to Natasha and I’m speechless.

“So? Do you like it?”

“Um, yes! This is amazing Natasha. You planned all of this by yourself?”

“Yeah. I spent the last week making some calls and all day today setting this up.”

Natasha looks proud of her work and she has the right to be.

“This is Gerald, he's the main chef of the company that caters for my film and was gracious enough to help me out.” Gerald walks out of the truck and towards us.

“Pleasure to meet you, Ms. Bauman. It’s my pleasure to be serving you and Ms. Negovanlis tonight.” Gerald reaches out his hand.

“Thank you! And thank you for doing this! I really appreciate it.” I shake his hand.

“That’s Thomsen, he works with Gerald.” Thomsen walks over as well.

“Pleasure to meet and serve you tonight Ms. Bauman.”

“Shall we?” Natasha looks towards the table.

Thomsen walks over first and pulls out my chair for me. He then walks over to Natasha’s side and pulls out her chair for her too.

Seeing how fancy all of this is so far, makes me feel underdressed. Natasha did, however, tell me to dress casual so I don’t linger on the thought.

The dinner was a three-course meal all very well made. By the end of it, I was so full I couldn’t move.

When we finished Natasha walked over to the bag she brought and pulled out two blankets and a long cushion. I’m wondering how she fit all of that in there…

She laid out one the blankets near the edge of the hill and motioned for me to come over.

She told me to sit down and to wait.

She walked back to Gerald and Thomsen to thank them. I assume she released them from their duties because Thomsen started cleaning up and soon enough both of them drove off in the food truck.

The company of Thomsen and Gerald was great but it was nice to finally be alone with Natasha.

Natasha laid down next to me and we just watched the sunset.

For a few minutes, we just laid there in silence. I was enjoying the embrace of Natasha and the view.

“I want it all.” Confused I look over at Natasha.

“I want it all with you.” She repeats herself and looks over at me.

“I want the sunrise and sunset. Fancy dinners outdoors and ordering take-out at home. Messy pasts and beautiful futures. I want it all with you.” Natasha kisses me on the head.

“I want it all too.” I smile.

“I want to build our house here. Our 4 kids can run around and have fun maybe even get a few dogs.”

I’m not sure if I’m more taken back by her first statement or the latter.

“Here?”

“This is my land. Land of Natasha Negovanlis. 5 whole acres.” I didn’t know how to register that.

“What?! You own 5 acres of land. Since when?”

“Since last week.” Natasha has been very nonchalant about this whole thing so far.

“I got an official envelope in the mail a few weeks ago and it was from my dad.” Concern washes over my face when she mentions her dad.

“It had 3 things. A letter, a check, and my rights to this land.” Natasha was looking out towards the skyline and her finger was trailing my arm.

“I saw the letter first and when I saw it was from him I put it back and ignored it. After a couple weeks I finally decided to read the letter. He said he’s tried calling several times but always hung up before I could answer because he never knew what to say. He talked about the land and the money in the letter alongside a very short apology. Apparently, this land was supposed to be Jacob and I’s wedding present. But with everything that’s happened between us, he never knew how to bring it up. Jacob must have known about it because my dad said he was the one who encouraged him to reach out. Jacob told my dad how happy you made me,” Natasha looks over at me and smiled.

“and how you were the one. My dad must have had some sort of change of heart because this is his way of giving a peace offering. I didn’t want to take it at first. I was still mad at him and then the whole Sharon thing happened and I was scared. I was scared that I had lost you and this land would have been for nothing. So when we figured things out I knew I had to accept it. If not for me then for you. This land is our future Elise. This land is my way of wanting forever and I know this a lot especially for a first date,” Natasha let out a shaky laugh.

“but I want forever with you Elise. I want it all.” Natasha looked over at me waiting for me to say something.

My heart broke when she mentioned she was scared.

“I’m sorry I made you feel that way. I never meant to scare you. I was mad but I wasn’t going to leave you.” I kiss Natasha’s shoulder.

“And thank you. I want it all too. I want this future. I want to have kids and dogs and a big house. But I’d still be happy if we didn’t have any of it. I’d be happy as long as I had you to love.”

Natasha leans in to give me kiss. It was a lingering kiss. Not too short but not breathtakingly passionate.

“The check.” Natasha looks up at the sky

“What about the check?”

“It’s what I’m going to use to build a house.”

“How… much was it?” I’m hesitant to ask.

“10 million dollars.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I hope you enjoyed this chapter and I hope it made up for the very long wait!! So, for some exciting news now! The first part of the first installment of my new Supergirl series is finally out! The series is called Chapters Of Love and the first installment is called Chapter One - Who do I love? For more info and a preview of it make sure you read on to the next chapter!
> 
> \- B


	22. New Supergirl Series!

AN: Hey everyone! If you're reading this it's probably because you're interested in my new Supergirl series so, thank you and welcome! I started this series after my realization of this intense need of a AgentReign fluff story. I've been all over trying to find some good ones and only found a couple so I decided to write my own! However, this series isn't an AgentReign specific story so I hope I haven't disappointed any of you yet. It covers a variety of ships and some new ones as well. I tried to make so that it basically had all the different ships everyone is rooting for so don't hate me if you don't like parts of it please! The series is called Chapters Of Love and the first installment is called Chapter One - Who do I love? As you can tell from the titles these stories will basically be focused on love. What it means to love. It's not just about romantic love either. There'll be a lot of friendship and family love as well. Like I said, a little bit of something for everyone. I'll be posting for this series in parts. Each installment will be 15 parts and I will post 3 chapters at a time. Unlike More To Us it's not in a first person narration but a third person narration. It's something different I wanted to try so for those of you who liked the writing style of More To Us I hope you like the style of this one too. The first part of Chapter One - Who do I love? will be up by the time you're reading this so make sure you check it out on my profile! Below is just a quick preview of what the story is about to get you guys interested!

\- B

After Lena realized that Sam was Reign, with the help of the DEO, they were finally able to defeat Reign altogether. It’s been a year and a half since everything went down and things seem to have gone back to as normal as it could. Mon-El and Imra are still married, Psi occasionally stops by the DEO to help out with cases, Lena and Kara are still best friends, James and Lena never picked up with their relationship, Winn is as geeky as usual and he’s been venturing into relationships he’s never imagined before, Alex and Ruby are closer than ever, and Sam well, she’s had quite the life.

They’ve all conquered life and death situations yet there’s one thing none of them can figure out. Love. How do you do it? How do you survive the wrath of love? Do you give into love or resist it? How do you know you’re loving “the one”? So many questions which all of them are answering in their own way.


	23. Chapter 19: How We Say "I love you"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I'm back! This chapter is a bit shorter but it'll still be good I promise. Enjoy!  
> \- B

**One month later**

**POV Natasha**

I open my eyes to see Elise’s beautiful face hidden under the sheets.

After our first official date, we haven’t had much time together. I’ve been so busy with filming that this is the first time in weeks I’ve woken up at a decent time with Elise by my side.

I just lay there watching Elise sleep. She’s such a peaceful sleeper in the morning. Unlike at nights where she snores a bit and occasionally kicks but I make sure I don’t bring that up or else she might move back to her room.

After watching her sleep awhile I start to get up to use the bathroom.

“Hey,” Elise’s cute face emerges from the covers.

“Hey babe,” I sink back into the bed.

“How long have you been awake for?” Elise’s voice is still groggy from just waking up.

I look over at the clock on my nightstand.

“About 30 minutes.” I shrug.

“I actually really have to use the bathroom so be right back.” I get up quickly.

“Haha okay. I’ll be here.” Elise’s eyes track me as I head towards the bathroom.

When I come back I see that Elise hasn’t moved an inch since I left.

“See, I said I’d be here.” Elise gives me a cheeky smile.

I just shake my head and walk towards the bed again.

Once I get under the covers Elise automatically rolls over and wraps her arm around my stomach.

“Are you working today?” Elise looks up.

“Nope. This week is the final week of shooting and they don’t me today.” I lean down to kiss her.

The kiss starts of sweet but I progressively feel Elise lean into.

Naturally, I roll on top of her now straddling her.

My hands get tangled in her hair as my lips work their magic against hers.

Elise’s draped hand is now making its way up my side alongside her other hand.

My tongue swipes across her bottom lip followed by her teeth pulling at mine.

As I lean more into the kiss I can feel Elise smile.

“What?” I slightly pull back.

“Haha, nothing. Just that you’ve got morning breath.” I frown.

“No no, it’s okay.” Elise pulls me back in.

“I’m going to go brush my teeth.” I jump off Elise and shoot straight towards the bathroom embarrassed.

“Natasha!” Elise calls out behind me.

I get into the bathroom and quickly brush my teeth.

“Natasha,” Elise walks in and wraps her arms around me.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to embarrass you.” Elise kisses me on my shoulder.

I quickly rinse my mouth.

“It’s okay. I don’t want you to have to suffer from my morning breath.” I look up and talk to the mirror.

I grab the towel hanging on the wall and wipe my mouth.

I turn around so that I’m facing Elise.

I lean back down to continue where I left off. However, Elise starts giggling.

“What now?” I pull back with my eyebrows raised.

“You missed a spot.” Elise points to the corner of my mouth.

I turn back around towards the mirror to see that she was right. I can feel Elise’s body vibrating behind me from her laughter.

“It’s okay babe, I still love you no matter what.” Elise rests her head on my shoulder.

“Thanks.” I jokingly roll my eyes.

Having broken our rhythm twice already we give up trying to make out and head downstairs to eat breakfast.

I reach the bottom of the stairs first and see the house blueprint laid out on the table.

I had gone to bed early last night and Elise must’ve worked on it while I was asleep.

“How’s it going?” I nod towards the table.

“Still stuck on whether I want a big walk-in closet or a nice bathroom.” Elise lets out a big sigh.

“What a dilemma,” I say sarcastically.

“Hey! This is a very important decision!” Elise says sternly.

“Mhmm.” I stroll towards the coffee and pour myself a cup.

“If you really don’t care I can just build you a small shed to live out of in the backyard.” Elise gives me a half smile.

“Mhmm, last time I checked this was my land we were building on with my multi-million dollar check.” I raise my eyebrows and walk towards Elise.

“Okay okay fine. Well, if we take out the extra guest room we could have both. This way there’ll still be a guest bedroom on the first floor, a guest room on the second floor with a lounge area and our room and essentially our own floor on the third floor.” Elise explains.

Ever since I told Elise about the land she’s dedicated every second of her free time to drawing out the blueprint. Seeing how excited she was I decided to let her make the major decisions. I just occasionally check in to see how things are going. I don’t think she realizes it’s just the two of us moving in yet because so far the house contains four floors, one of which is a basement and three bedrooms.

“If that makes you happy then go right ahead cupcake.” I lay a kiss on her head and sit down at the table.

Elise gives me a look from the other side of the table.

“What now?” I say in a defeated voice.

“Breakfast,” Elise says as if it’s obvious.

“Yes, it’s time for breakfast. What about it though?” I give her a half smile catching on.

“I thought you were gonna make breakfast!” Elise responds as if I’m serious.

“You expected such a thing without even a ‘please’?” I tease.

Elise pouts.

“But I wanted pancakes and you make the best blueberry pancakes.”

Not being able to resist the adorable pout I give in.

“Okay okay, you win. Blueberry pancakes it is. You owe me big time for it.” I get up and walk towards the fridge.

“I know a way I could repay you.” Elise wiggles her brows.

“Little miss Bauman being dirty?” I smirk.

“Oh, I was thinking of taking you to the puppy pound but I guess that works too.” Elise causally shrugs.

I let out a light laugh as I grab the ingredients for blueberry pancakes.

After we finished eating we headed back upstairs to get ready for the day.

I was in the middle of changing when I heard Elise walk in.

“Hey,” Elise smiled as she walked into my closet.

She was already changed into a loose tank top and shorts per usual. I, on the other hand, was standing in my closet pantsless in just a t-shirt.

Elise just casually walked up to me and wrapped her arms around my torso.

She slowly leaned in for a longer than usual kiss.

“Hmm, what’s this for?” I pull back slightly to look at her.

“Well, you did say I owed you and I couldn’t resist not coming in when you were standing here pantsless.” Elise pulled back to look me up and down.

“I see.” I smile as I pull her into a longer more passionate kiss.

We slowly start moving towards my unmade bed.

My hands were roaming Elise’s back as her fingers tug at the edge of my t-shirt.

Elise stops moving once the back of her legs hit the edge of the bed.

I gently lay her down on the bed without breaking our kiss.

Finally, when we come up for air I immediately move down to her neck.

I could hear an inaudible moan escape Elise’s mouth.

Being proud of that I continue to trail kisses down to her collarbone.

At this point, my hands had traveled up under her shirt one hand slightly grazing her abs while the other held her hip.

I slowly started working my way back up towards her mouth, which is when Elise tugged on my shirt again.

Instantly my shirt was lying on the floor.

I heard Elise’s breath hitch and pulled back.

“You’re gorgeous. I mean I knew that before but damn.” Elise’s eyes roamed my body.

I just smiled and gently pulled on her shirt.

Elise nodded in response.

I slowly pulled up her top exposing her abdomen and the black sports bra she was wearing.

After the shirt came off completely Elise pulled me down into the bed as well.

She then rolled on top of me and took control.

She started from the bottom of my stomach and worked her way up. My body couldn’t help but move with her movement.

Once she reached my face she reached towards my back and was ready to flip off my bra the moment I gave the okay.

I just moaned in return and before I knew it Elise was working her way back down.

Now that’s how you say, “I love you”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I hope you guys liked this chapter! For future references this will probably be the extent to the smut I write. I love reading them but I'm terrible at writing them so hopefully I don't leave you too unsatisfied. Also, for those of you who have not yet checked out my Supergirl series you should go do that now!
> 
> \- B


	24. Update

AN: Hi everyone. I apologize but this isn't a new chapter but it is about it so please read on. The next chapter was supposed to be posted last week but some things came up and I never got around to finishing it. However, I will finish it, I promise, and post it eventually. With that being said I do I have to apologize for the following news. There has been some personal stuff going on in my life which is why all my updates have been later than usual lately. Also, these next few weeks are very very hectic for me. I have to make a college decision by next week, I have to figure out college stuff, work, and I have graduation at the end of May so, I think I have to put a pause to the writing. I need to take a short hiatus from all my writing because trying to post updates has been adding too much stress and I just can't have that in my life right now. Also, trying to crank out chapters I think has made the content lack a bit and I know I can do better than that for y'all. So, be patient with me as I try to figure out my life and get you guys the best story possible. For now let's say a month to a month and a half break before I come back. If I feel a surge of inspiration I promise to write and post but don't count on it. So hang tight readers!

Another thing about the story. I have decided to wrap up More To Us at 25 chapters. Which means there are 5 more chapters to come. My plan is, if people want it, I will continue on with Volume II but for now let's focus on this current one. I have the rest of the chapters planned out vaguely so I am excited for all of you guys to discover it with me.

Thank you again for being so supportive and being avid readers. I appreciate it and could not do it without y'all. I hope so see y'all soon!

\- B


	25. Update

AN: Hi everyone. I apologize but this isn't a new chapter but it is about it so please read on. The next chapter was supposed to be posted last week but some things came up and I never got around to finishing it. However, I will finish it, I promise, and post it eventually. With that being said I do I have to apologize for the following news. There has been some personal stuff going on in my life which is why all my updates have been later than usual lately. Also, these next few weeks are very very hectic for me. I have to make a college decision by next week, I have to figure out college stuff, work, and I have graduation at the end of May so, I think I have to put a pause to the writing. I need to take a short hiatus from all my writing because trying to post updates has been adding too much stress and I just can't have that in my life right now. Also, trying to crank out chapters I think has made the content lack a bit and I know I can do better than that for y'all. So, be patient with me as I try to figure out my life and get you guys the best story possible. For now let's say a month to a month and a half break before I come back. If I feel a surge of inspiration I promise to write and post but don't count on it. So hang tight readers!

Another thing about the story. I have decided to wrap up More To Us at 25 chapters. Which means there are 5 more chapters to come. My plan is, if people want it, I will continue on with Volume II but for now let's focus on this current one. I have the rest of the chapters planned out vaguely so I am excited for all of you guys to discover it with me.

Thank you again for being so supportive and being avid readers. I appreciate it and could not do it without y'all. I hope so see y'all soon!

\- B


	26. Chapter 20: You're My Star (P1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: HI EVERYONE!!! I'm finally back! I hope y'all missed me cause I definitely missed you all. I just want to say a quick thanks to all of you who've been patient enough to wait for me these past few weeks. I've had so much going on in my life and had such terrible writer's block so I wasn't in the best place to continue to write. However, this break has been great for me and I am back to writing regularly. I hope you enjoy this chapter and make sure you stick around for the AN at the bottom!
> 
> \- B

**3 months later**

**POV Natasha**

Today is the premiere of my movie and tonight there is a red carpet and a viewing for the whole cast and crew.

Of course, I’m taking Elise as my plus one.

We haven’t been to a movie premiere together since we did our movie together three years ago. Actually, Elise hasn’t been to a movie premiere in ages. Since she took a break from acting a couple years back she hasn’t had any premieres to attend and mine were all either in New York or LA so she would stay home with Andrew while I was away.

We had gotten fitted for our outfits a few weeks ago but there was still a lot of prepping to do today.

Elise and I planned on going on a quick lunch date before we headed over to the studio to get ready for the big night.

“I’m so proud of you babe.” Elise comes up behind me to give me a hug.

“I know this started off a bit rocky but I’m here for you now.” Elise rubbed a hand up and down my right arm.

I turn to face her.

“It’s okay. I realized that it might not have been the best news to hear from me and I withheld information when I should have just trusted you but we’re past all that now. I’m excited you’re coming to this with me tonight. You look smokin' in your outfit.” I wink at her.

“I could say the same for you Ms. Negovanlis.” Elise leans in for a kiss.

I don’t hesitate to lean in as well. I can feel Elise smile into the kiss.

“I love you.” Elise pulls away and smiles.

“I love you too.” I smile back.

“Okay, we better hurry or else we won’t even have time for lunch.” I look at the clock on the wall and it’s already 11.

We head over to Blue Bear Café.

I get a coffee and bagel breakfast sandwich while Elise opts to a vegan salad and a latte.

After we finish eating we hurry over to the studio to start the hair and makeup process.

Once we arrive there’s already a team of people ready to pamper us.

“Wow, babe, you must really be important if they sent these many people just for you!” Elise jokes.

“I mean I am the star aren’t I?” I jokingly flip my hair.

“Natasha you’re here!” Toddrick, my main hair stylist for the movie comes over to greet me.

“Hey Toddrick, how have you been?” I pull him into a hug.

The movie wrapped a few months ago so I haven’t seen him since.

“I’ve been great! You look fantastic by the way. Per usual.” Toddrick cups my face.

“Toddrick’s gay if you haven’t caught on yet.” I look over to explain to Elise.

“Yes, the gayest of the gays.” Toddrick exaggerates my point.

“Haha got it. Nice to meet you Toddrick, I’m Elise.” Elise reaches out her hand to greet him.

However, he abruptly pulls her into a hug.

“He also doesn’t do formality.” I laugh as I tell a slight shocked Elise.

“Nice to meet you, Elise! You must be the lovely girlfriend that Natasha won’t shut up about.” Elise turns to me and raises her eyebrows.

“What? You’re my whole world. I’m not allowed to talk about my world to my hair stylist?” I defend myself.

“Oh, and to the whole cast and crew.” Toddrick casually adds.

“Haha, so how much do these strangers know about me?” Elise jokes.

“Well, I know that you love green lattes, you fell off the swings when you were a kid and cri—”

“Okay Toddrick, I think she didn’t mean literally.” I gently shove him.

“You told everyone about the swing story!” Elise pouts.

“Babe, you were only 3. I think people understand that it’s more cute than embarrassing.” I try to make her feel better.

“Yes, adorable Elise.” Toddrick comments, which I give him a glare for.

Elise hides her face in her hands.

“Well, at least that’s the worst it can get.” Elise raises her face from her hands.

“She also mentioned how fun you’re in bed.” Toddrick wiggles his eyebrows.

Now, both our jaws drop.

“I’m kidding I’m kidding! She never mentioned that. But she did say you were quite the kisser.” He just winks and walks away.

“Toddrick!” I yell behind him.

He just laughs as he heads back to the makeup table.

“How am I supposed to get through tonight if everyone knows everything about me!” Elise exclaims.

“Haha relax babe. Toddrick was just kidding about the everything part. I swear that’s the extent to the things I’ve mentioned and I mean you are quite the kisser.” I smirk as I pull her into one.

I can hear Toddrick whistle from afar and I can’t help but laugh.

Elise might have some adjusting to do with my team but I know she’ll love them.

**POV Elise**

So far meeting Natasha’s team has been interesting. I learned that Toddrick could be a mouthful but is definitely chill and fun to be around.

After our hair and makeup are finished we head over to the room next doors for wardrobe.

Natasha and I both head into our separate rooms to finish getting ready.

I finish changing first so I decide to wait in Natasha’s room. I’m scrolling through Instagram when I hear the closet door open.

I look up and my jaw drops.

Natasha looks beautiful every day but today she’s breathtaking.

“Wow, babe you look absolutely stunning.” I stand in awe as I slowly scan Natasha’s body from top to bottom.

Natasha is wearing a long black and white dress with a very low cut front and complete backless back.

“I’d say you look pretty handsome yourself.” I blush at the compliment.

I, on the other hand, am wearing a black crop top pants set with a floral blazer. Natasha and I have very different senses of style but really compliment each other when we’re together.

“I guess I’ll just have to hold back the jealousy of all the men and women who’ll be drooling over you tonight,” I say as I let out a sigh.

“No matter how many people fond over me my eyes are set on you and you only.” Natasha leans in for a kiss.

“Hey, watch out for the lipstick it might get smudged.” I pull back.

“Hell to nice looking lips I just want yours on mine,” Natasha smirks as she leans in again.

I give in and start kissing her back. I smile into the kiss but don’t pull away.

It’s moments like these that remind me why I’m so happy. Being in Natasha’s arms, feeling her lips on mine, and breathing in her scent is what home is to me. Yeah, I know that’s cliché but I feel safe here.

At this point, our kiss is getting heated and honestly if it wasn’t for the knock on the door our hard efforts of dressing ourselves would be wasted.

“Come in!” Natasha answers.

“Oh was I interrupting something?” Toddrick asks as he tries to hide a smile.

“Oh no, nothing.” Natasha casually responds while attempting to wipe her smudged lipstick.

“Mhmm,” Toddrick responds in a sassy tone.

“You two better get your makeup fixed before heading out or else the whole world will know what you’ve been up to before your premiere.” Toddrick winks as he walks back out.

“Great, my first impression with your team is as a handsy girlfriend.” I sarcastically say.

“Hey, who’s to say that’s the worst thing in the world? I’m not complaining.” Natasha smiles.

She leans for another kiss but this time it’s short and sweet. She then grabs my hand pulls me back towards the makeup room.

After the hours of prepping Natasha and I pull up at the red carpet.

Immediately at our arrival, we run into Sharon.

“Natasha! You look gorgeous tonight!” Sharon exclaims as she pulls Natasha into a hug.

“Hi, Elise. I hope you’re doing well. You look amazing as well.” Sharon greets me.

“Thank you, Sharon, it’s nice to see you again. You look beautiful.” So far there isn’t any awkwardness between us.

“Yes, Sharon you look fantastic,” Natasha adds on.

“Natasha and Elise over here!” We hear Natasha’s publicist calling us over.

“Well, that’s our cue. We’ll see you later in the theater?” Natasha asks Sharon.

“Yes, of course. Enjoy the carpet!”

Natasha takes my hand once again and pulls me along the carpet.

I had almost forgotten the thrill, stress, joy, and exhilaration of walking a red carpet. So many lights flashing towards you and so many voices calling out your name but all of it felt so natural with Natasha by my side.

“Almost there, babe,” Natasha whispers in my ear as we see the end of the carpet.

After we make it through the carpet we find our way to the secluded theater. We walk in to see most of the cast and crew already seated.

I watch as Natasha greets every single person there and I shake a few hands myself. There are a couple of people here that I recognized from another project I did which was nice.

Natasha and I take our seat and other movie trailers start to play on the screen.

“They show movie trailers at a private screening?” I lean over towards Natasha and ask.

“Huh, I guess so. They’ve never done that at any other screenings I’ve been to.”

“Me neither. I guess this gives it a more “natural” feel to it as we watch the movie.”

Finally, the movie starts and my hand grabs Natasha’s.

Throughout the whole movie, I admire the talent on the screen. This movie is so important to Natasha and being able to celebrate this with her today makes me feel like the luckiest woman on the planet.

The credits start to roll and I turn to see Natasha’s eyes full of tears and a big smile on her face.

“I did it.” She says quietly.

“I know babe, you did it. Andrew would be very proud of his mommy right now.” I rub my hand up and down her arm.

The lights turn back on in the theater and Natasha quickly wipes away her tears.

Before everyone gets a chance to all shuffle out of the place Sharon gets up and says a few words.

“Hi everyone, I just wanted to thank you to everyone here and to those who weren’t able to make it tonight for all the hard work you have put into this movie the past few months. I may be the director but the movie is nothing without the amazing talents of the cast and the labor of the crew. So, thank you for being in this through it all and making all of us proud. To celebrate there’ll be a great after party at the Cheshire venue not far from here so I hope to see you all there!”

With that everyone starts to make their way out.

“You want to go to the after party?” Natasha asks me.

“Tonight, we can do whatever you want.” I give her a big smile **.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I hope y'all enjoyed this chapter! Just a few quick things. First off if you haven't noticed the title it does say P1 meaning this chapter is P1 out of two parts. Just as a token of gratitude my will post P2 tomorrow. Posting two days in a row crazy I know! Secondly, I just wanted to remind you guys that this volume is now coming to an end. We've only got a few more chapters until I wrap it up but don't you fret there is still more to come. I will keep you guys all posted on the things to come but for now, enjoy the rest of your day or night!
> 
> \- B


	27. Chapter 21: You're My Star (P2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey everyone! Another update just as promised. It's a wee bit shorter than usual but I promise it's still good. Just a quick heads up, there is a reference to an event in chapter 18 in this chapter for those of you who might be confused so you can always go back to refresh your memory! I actually had to myself... don't give me too much of a hard time it was a long break. Hope you enjoy!
> 
> \- B

**POV Natasha**

Elise and I decided to swing by the after party and celebrate a little. With our busy schedules, we haven’t gotten a chance to go out and have a good time in awhile so we thought this would be a good opportunity.

I’m at the bar with my drink just watching Elise enjoying the party. Yes, this is my after party but it’s nice to just sit and watch Elise interacting with other people from this industry.

“Oh my god, did you know that Jenny interned for Woody Allen when she was in high school?” Elise walks over with an ecstatic look on her face.

“I did not. But I did know that Jenny has long resume.” I take a sip of my drink.

“Why aren’t you out mingling with everyone?” Elise asks in slightly worried tone.

“I worked with these people for half a year. Saw them every day. I’m just enjoying watching you have the time of your life.” I respond with a smile.

“Are you sure? If you want to go home don’t hesitate to tell me. Again, tonight is about you.” Elise takes my hand and kisses the back of it.

“I’m good right here. You continue to geek out over other people’s experiences.” I tease Elise.

“You’re the best.” Elise leans down for a quick kiss before she dashes off into the crowd again.

Eventually, the night comes to an end and Elise and I head back home.

“You know, we spent all night with other people but we never actually got to celebrate ourselves. Just the two of us.” Elise says slyly as she pulls me into an embrace.

It's been less than 10 seconds since we've entered the house and we're already intertwined with each other.

“Huh, is that so? I hadn’t noticed.” I close the remaining gap between us.

The kiss is delicate and Elise hums against my lips. It then escalates to a battle of our tongues.

First, Elise’s blazer drops to the ground. We slowly make our way upstairs until Elise finds the zipper on the backside of my dress. At this point, we’re just attempting to make our way up the stairs without falling over our clothing.

We finally reach the bedroom and now we’re both stripped down to our underwear.

The night that was supposed to be sexy comes to an abrupt end when both of us are hit with a wave of exhaustion.

“Babe, as much as I’m enjoying this I feel a yawn coming,” I say as I finish off with a yawn.

“Oh good, cause I was exhausted too.” Elise leans her forehead against mine.

We decide to call it a night and collapse into the bed behind us.

**The next day**

I wake up before Elise does so I decide to make her breakfast. I quietly walk out of the bedroom following the trail of clothes we left behind last night. I then remember that I’m only partially clothed and grab my robe from the bathroom before I head down to the kitchen.

**POV Elise**

I wake to find Natasha’s side of the bed empty. I pout until I smell the aroma of a waffle breakfast downstairs.

I get up and walk into the closet to get a set of clothes. As I grab a t-shirt from my drawer I find the envelope I had stashed away a few months ago. I had completely forgotten I had found it. Having seen it again makes me realize that I should probably give this back to Natasha.

After finishing getting ready I finally make my way downstairs with the envelope in my hand.

“Good morning sleepy head. Just was about to come up to wake you.” Natasha sets down the last of the food.

“Good morning babe.” I give her a quick kiss before I sit down.

“What’s that?” Natasha asks looking at the envelope.

“It’s actually yours,” I say hesitantly.

“Oh?”

“I found it while cleaning a few months ago and meant to give it to you but completely forgot. I didn’t mean to snoop around and I probably shouldn’t have opened it but it was unlabeled so I checked to see what it was. I’m sorry.” I hand her the envelope.

Natasha doesn’t seem to know what’s contained in the envelope because she takes it with confusion.

She pulls out the letter and starts reading.

And then her face drops.

“I didn’t read the whole thing. I just read the first couple lines and stopped.” I quickly add.

“Where’d you find this?” Natasha asks.

There aren’t any traces of anger or betrayal in her voice which reassures me but I'm still staying careful.

“I found a box of Andrew’s old things. His baby things you had put away and it was in the bottom of it. I figured it was misplaced or something which is why I opened it to check. I’m so sorry again.” I explain.

“No, it’s okay. I’m actually glad you found it. I should have told you sooner but I didn’t because I didn’t think I needed to which was wrong of me.” Natasha put the letter down and turned to face me.

“What is it?” I try not to sound too concerned.

“When I first told you about Jacob and what happened between us I left out a few things. Right before I left Jacob he cheated on me.”

“He what?” I was shocked.

“Wait, let me finish.” Natasha continued.

“But that wasn’t the reason why I left him. I made him believe it was which wasn’t fair of me. Jacob and I were separated for a bit before that happened and when we were I was with someone else. I never told him because I knew it was wrong and I immediately cut him out of my life but when Jacob told me his mistake right away I felt like a terrible person and pushed him away. I couldn’t deal with what I did so put the guilt and blame on him. This letter,” Natasha picks up the letter.

“Was me trying to apologize to him. I knew I had to make things right but I didn’t know how. This was right before I met you and I was in a bad place. I didn’t know what I was doing and the guilt was eating away at me. I finally finished the letter but never ended up addressing the envelope. I put it in the box of Andrew’s things and didn’t look at it again.” Natasha finally finished.

“Thank you for telling me.” I put my hand on hers.

“You’re not mad?” Natasha asks with a softened gaze.

“Of course not. You had a whole life before I was even in the picture. You’ve been through so much and I’m not here to judge you for your mistakes of the past. You made a terrible mistake and you felt bad about it. I know you’d never do anything to intentionally hurt me so it doesn’t change anything.” I reassure her.

**POV Natasha**

“Really?” I’m a bit surprised.

I didn’t expect a whole blowout or something but I wasn’t sure if she’d be upset.

“I’m 110 percent sure. I’m here till the end.”

That’s when I knew.

“Marry me.”


	28. Chapter 22: Marry Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey! New update here. So, don't hate me after reading this chapter. I promise I have a plan. A plan y'all will love. But life ain't fun if it's too easy right? Enjoy!
> 
> \- B

**POV Elise**

“Marry me.”

Natasha just proposed.

The woman I’m madly in love with just proposed to me but,

“No,” I say.

Instantly I see the hurt wash over Natasha’s face.

“W-what?” She asks hesitantly.

“I love you, Natasha. Actually, I’m in love with you but I can’t marry you. At least not right now.” Natasha pulls her hands away from me.

“What do you mean? I thought everything was going great for us. You said you were here till the end literally just now. I thought this is what you wanted.” Anger is starting to mix into Natasha’s voice.

“No, babe I do and I meant all of it. I promise I will be by your side till the end and I want to experience all of it with you but we can’t get married right now.” I look at her with apologetic eyes.

“Why?” Natasha asks quietly.

“We’ve been through so much together but I know nothing about you. I love what we have and I cherish everything we’ve been through together but there’s still so much I don’t know about you and so much you don’t know about me. I’m not saying getting to know each other more will change anything but I want to do that. I want us to do this properly.” I explain.

“We can still get to know each other when we’re engaged! Like you said, it’s not like it’ll change anything.” Natasha insists.

“Call me old school but I want to do this right with you. I don’t want us to rush into things. We have all the time in the world.” I repeat myself.

“Okay.” I can see the hurt lingering in Natasha’s eyes.

Natasha turns towards her food and starts eating. The remainder of the morning passes by in silence.

“I’m going out for a drive.” Natasha grabs her keys and walks towards the door.

Knowing why she needed some air I don’t pry and let her leave.

**POV Natasha**

I’m not mad.

Honestly, I’m not sure if I should be mad.

I love Elise. Elise loves me. It’s simple as that or at least I thought it was until this morning. I want to understand for Elise but I can’t. So, I’m driving to the one person who would.

**_Flashback to 4 months ago_ **

**_POV Jacob_ **

_“Hey, so I was thinking I should probably move out.” I casually said._

_Elise was out of town for work for a couple of days so Natasha and I decided to stay home and cook for once._

_Elise and Natasha had finally made their relationship official and I was starting to get a grip on my own life so I thought it was time._

_“Really?” Natasha questioned as she was grabbing food from the fridge._

_“Yeah, I mean it only makes sense. You guys have been gracious enough to let me crash here the past few months and don’t you think it was awkward enough to be living with your ex-husband and best friend and now ex-husband and girlfriend?” I asked._

_“Haha, I guess you have a point there. Well, you’re still welcome to stay here while you look for a new place.” Natasha offered._

_“Thanks. It probably won’t be a long stay because Annie and I have been looking for a place for a couple of days now.”_

_“You’re moving in with Annie?” Natasha asked a bit surprised._

_“Oh no, she’s just been helping me look for a place. She been helping a lot lately with just getting my life back on track you know?” I clarified._

_“Ah, I see. I’m glad you have her Jacob. It’s nice to see you finding what you want and need again.”_

 

**POV Natasha**

I pull up in Jacob’s driveway and kind of just sit there for a few minutes.

I must have lost track of time because I hear a tap on my car window.

I roll my window down.

“Hey stranger, were you planning on coming inside?” Jacob is standing on the other side of the door.

“Oh hey. Yeah, sorry just was doing some thinking.” I take the keys out of the engine and get out of the car.

“Is something up? I mean don’t get me wrong, I love having you over but you rarely do come over and since I didn’t invite you and seeing you needed to do some thinking I’m assuming everything isn’t okay.” Jacob holds the door open for me as I walk in.

“Thanks. Nothing’s wrong. Well, at least I hope not.” I walk straight to the fridge and grab a beer.

“Wow, that bad huh?” He half-jokes.

“I proposed to Elise.” I turn to face Jacob.

“Oh wow! Congrats! But why is that bad?” Confusion crosses Jacob’s face.

“She said no,” I say in a monotone voice.

I grab a beer opener from the drawer, open my beer and take a big swing.

“Wait, she said no? Why?” Jacob sounds even more confused now.

“A few months after I left you I wrote a letter. In the letter, I explained that I cheated before you did with an apology. I meant to send that letter to you but I never got myself to addressing it let alone mailing it.”

I walk over to the dinner table and sit down. Jacob follows and sits across from me.

“A few months ago, Elise found the letter while cleaning. She started to read it but never got to the confession part. She held onto until this morning when she showed it to me.” I look down at the bottle and start strumming my fingers on the side.

“I didn’t want to lie to her anymore so I told her. And she didn’t care.” The expression on Jacob’s face didn’t change.

“Not only did she not care she told me how much she loves me and that she wasn't here to judge. So, at that moment I thought it all clicked and I proposed and she said no. She said that she didn’t want to rush things. She said that there was still a lot to learn about each other.” A tear slips from my eyes.

“I know it’s not this but why does it sound so much like she doesn’t want to marry me?” I slump into my chair.

“You and I, we’ve been broken beyond repair and we come with a lot of baggage. We’ve been through a lot more in the past 5 years than anyone has in a lifetime. You more than me. We’ve lived our lives thinking we were never good enough for someone yet we found our people. But even when we have people willing to love us endlessly we can’t believe it but you have to. Elise loves you. She’s always going to be there just like she promised. You don’t have to be married to change that fact. She didn’t say no because she loves you any less but because she wants to love you more.” I smile a little.

“Since when did you become so wise?” I tease.

“Hey, you’ve given me so much support and advice in the past I thought I’d return the favor.” Jacob shrugs.

“So, you don’t think this is something I should be worried about?” I ask wearily.

“No, but the only way to be sure is to talk to Elise. By the looks of it, she already told you how she felt but it’s not fair to her if you’re not being honest.” Jacob suggests.

“Yeah, been there done that. Didn’t go so well last time. Thank you, Jacob. I really needed to hear that.” I give Jacob an earnest smile.

Since I was already there Jacob and I decide to hang out for a bit before I headed out.

A couple hours later I’m back in my driveway.

I walk inside with lunch that I had picked up on the way over.

When I walk in Elise looks up from her computer to greet me.

“Hey, how was your drive?” I walk over to the table.

“I actually ended up going over to Jacob’s. Instincts I guess.” I put the food down and sit.

“Oh, okay.” Elise doesn’t look hurt or even surprised.

“I’m sorry about this morning.” I start to apologize.

“I’m sorry for just proposing like that and expecting you to be ready.”

“Natasha, you don’t have to apologize for anything. You were just doing what your heart thought was right and I was flattered that you wanted to marry me. I’m sorry that my response wasn’t what you expected. But I do want to marry you. Just not this soon.” Elise takes my hands.

“And I understand now.” I nod my head.

“You’re right. Your response wasn’t what I expected at all and if I’m being honest I was confused and hurt but now I see that I was trying to rush something that didn’t need to be rushed. I’m happy the way things are now. Do I wish you’d say yes? Yeah, totally but I love you to the ends of the earth and I’m willing to wait for you to say yes even if that means waiting a whole lifetime.” I bring Elise’s hands to my lips.

With everything finally out in the open we enjoy our meal and spend the rest of the day getting to know each other more.


	29. Chapter 23: The Bahamas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey guys! I know I know, you guys all probably hate me because it's basically been about half a year since I've posted and I'm so sorry. College started and I got so busy with life and all that I never got around to writing. But, a new chapter is finally here and if I'm productive enough maybe I'll finish this installment of the series by the end of the year but I can't make any promises. I hope y'all enjoy this chapter!
> 
> \- B

 

**2 weeks later**

**POV Elise**

Last week Jacob was promoted to COO of his new company and as an additional promotional gift, his company gave him 4 tickets to a resort in the Bahamas. Jacob planned on going with Annie and a couple of friends from work but they got pulled into a last minute business trip so, Jacob invited Natasha and me.

"Hey babe, did you pack the sunscreen?"

“Right here!” Natasha shakes the bottle of sunscreen in her hand.

Natasha walks up behind me. She slowly wraps her arms around my waist as she drops the sunscreen in the suitcase in front of us.

"I'm really excited for this vacation." Natasha talks against my neck.

The warmth of her breath against my neck causes me to relax into Natasha's arms.

"So am I."

At this moment all I feel is pure happiness.

This is all I’ve ever needed in my life. As cliché as it is, it’s true, home isn’t a place but two arms and a warm heart.

“As much as I love just standing here we should probably hurry up. We have to leave for the airport in 4 hours and we’re barely done packing.” Natasha cuts the moment short.

I let out a whimper to show my dissatisfaction but let her go.

“I’ll start making us some lunch. You finish packing the beach stuff.” I turn around to face Natasha.

I give her a quick kiss before I head downstairs.

**4 hours later**

Just as I’m zipping up my suitcase I get a notification on my phone alerting me that our Uber has arrived.

“Natasha, our ride is here. We gotta go.” I yell up the stairs.

A few seconds later Natasha makes her way down the stairs. She’s wearing a big sun hat and sunglasses.

“You’re really sporting that ‘I’m a cool grandma’ look.” I tease.

“Hey, if you don’t like it you don’t have to look at it,” Natasha responds nonchalantly and walks past me.

I gently grab her arm and pull her back towards me.

“I could look at you all day every day no matter what you looked like.” A smile grows on Natasha’s face.

“All this flirting is going to make us miss our flight.” She says coyly before slipping out of my hand.

I let out a small chuckle and follow her out the door.

**POV Natasha**

We arrive at the airport and meet up with Jacob and Annie.

“I’m so excited for this trip!” Annie gushes as we wait in line for security.

“Me too! This is going to be a fun week.”

Jacob and Elise are busy talking about all the outdoorsy activities that await them.

“So, how are things with you and Jacob?” I turn towards Annie.

“Things are great.” Annie flashes me a big smile.

“I’ve never seen Jacob this happy before and that makes me happy.”

“It’s nice to see Jacob finally getting his happy ending. You make him happy Annie. Thank you.” I thank Annie.

“Nothing special I did,” Annie gently shakes her head.

“Jacob’s really grown into his best self and we’re in a good place.”

“You know, I keep hearing my name back there. I hope y’all aren’t sharing war stories or something about me.” Jacob turns to face us.

Annie and I both let out a small laugh.

“I’d be opening a can of worms if I started.” I teased.

“Oof,” Jacob jokingly brought his hand to his heart.

After we got through security we found our gate and waited to board.

With some time to kill Jacob and Annie go look for something to eat while Elise and I stick around in case there are any changes with the flight.

As my time as an actress I’ve spent a fair share of my time at airports so, I picked up people watching.

Sitting next to us is what I presume to be a grandmother and her grandson who’s busy playing on his Gameboy while the grandma is knitting.

When I look up across from us a smile appears on my face but a somewhat sad smile.

It’s two moms with a toddler boy sitting on one of their laps.

They look happy. The boy is playing with a toy firetruck as the mom runs a hair through his hair.

I feel Elise’s hand fall over mine.

“Are you okay?” Elise asks as she rubs her hand up and down my arm.

“Yeah, just thinking.” I lightly shake my head.

“We should adopt a baby.” Elise blurts out.

“What?” I’m taken back by the statement.

“I mean, that is if you want to. I know Andrew was the world to you and there’s nobody who could replace him but if you wanted to I would raise a kid with you. A part of you will always be a mother and I’m willing to be one too.” I’m left speechless.

We have never fully discussed this before so this came as a shock to me. I’ve mentioned having more kids but never considered it in the near future.

“What happened to ‘doing things the right way’?” I ask confused.

“It’s the 21st century. What’s considered the ‘right way’ anyway?” Elise says with air quotes.

“What are you saying?” I press, still confused.

That’s when Elise gets up from her seat and down on one knee.

“I was going to wait until we got to the resort to do this but let’s be spontaneous.”

Elise reaches into to her pocket and pulls out a small velvet box.

“When I first met you, I had no idea how madly I would fall in love. You have shown me what true strength is and brought joy into my life. You’re my best friend but also the love of my life. Natasha Negovanlis, will you marry me?” Elise opens the box.

Inside is a beautiful diamond ring set on a simple infinity band.

I’m so taken back by what just happened that it takes me a moment to answer. When I finally snap back to reality I realize that everyone including Elise is staring at me waiting for a response.

“Yes!” I exclaim.

The whole gate then burst out into applause.

I lean down to pull Elise into a kiss.

She pulls back first and reaches inside the box.

I reach out my hand out and Elise slides the perfectly sized ring onto my hand.

“What’d we miss?” Annie and Jacob walk over looking confused.

“I said yes!” I say flaunting my new accessorized hand in front of Annie.

“OMG! Congratulation!!! To the both of you!” Annie rushes over to give both of us a hug.

I turn to look at Jacob just standing there with a smug but not surprised look.

That’s when it clicks. Elise must have talked to Jacob and that’s probably how she got the perfect ring size.

I just mouth a thank you which Jacob responds with a nod.

After gushing over the ring and what just happened it’s finally time to board the plane.

The vacation hasn’t even started yet and it’s already the best one I’ve ever been on.


End file.
